Saturday, November 05, 2011

Best of the Week - 11/5/11

Quote of the Week: So you’re a religious man and a torturer. What are you? Catholic? (Saul, Homeland)

Song of the Week: Living In America – James Brown (How I Met Your Mother)

Gratuitous Token Hot Chick Picture of the Week:

Scene of the Week:

Big News of the Week: Nope, Not Gonna Do It: I refuse to give publicity to anyone who sole purpose to what they do is to gain more publicity. Nope, not gonna do it. And anyone who complains about these sorts of thing, just ignore them, even complaining about them is what they want because all they want is to be talked about. So stop taking about them.

Free Download of the Week: Public Enemy No. 1 – Megadeath (iTunes)

Deal of the Week: 100 Albums for $5: This month for only $5, you can get full albums from Coldplay, Lauryn Hill, Stevie Wonder, and the Footloose Soundtrack (the real one).

New Album Release of the Week: Wish You Were Here - Immersion Box Set - Pink Floyd

New DVD Release of the Week: Alpocalypse-HD (Blu-ray)

Video of the Week: Kristen Bell in her underwear; Emmy Rossum wearing less. If this does not get you to order Showtime, I do not know what will. You have until January 8 when House of Lies premieres and Shameless returns to do so.

Next Week Pick of the Week: Hell on Wheels, Sunday at 10:00 on AMC: This may be the least buzzed about show of the fall because I heard very little about it so far. What I gather it is a period piece that has something to do with the railway and Common is in it. I am always up for a history lesson on television so I will at least give it a chance. Worse case scenerio it is a low rent Deadwood and I can be fine with that.

Friday, November 04, 2011

Around the Tubes - 11/4/11

I have gotten a plethora of cool press releases have been flooding my inbox recently that you may find interesting. This post will include blurbs on The Witch Doctor Will See You Now, Parks and Recreations, Keep a Child Alive with Alicia Keys, The Real L Word, Neverland, The Wild Thornberrys, Mr. Magoo, Impractical Jokers, Archer, and a TV Guide Reader's Poll.

- Is there a better way to get your attention then with a title “3 Kinds of Penis Wine”? Did not think so. Supposedly the cocktail has healing properties and these weird concoctions is exactly what they are looking for on The Witch Doctor Will See You Now which will be airing a new episode four straight nights next week on The National Geographic Channel at 10:00 starting Monday. As for the Three Penis Wine, here is someone actually sampling it:

3 Kinds of Penis Wine

- For those that could not get enough Parks and Recreations last night, has five webisodes featuring April and Andy’s roadtrip.

- In honor of World’s Aids Day, Showtime will air Keep a Child Alive with Alicia Keys Thursday December 1 at 9:00. The documentary follows the songstress to Africa during the recent World Cup to see how Aids has affected the country.

- In other Showtime news, the channel recently announced that they have renewed The Real L Word, but for the third season they will be moving to New York City and will be introducing new cast members while also featuring the return of fan favorites. No word yet on an airdate.

- Syfy’s latest miniseries Neverland is just a month away and here is the latest promo:

A Story You Never Knew

- Hitting shelves next week is The Wild Thornberrys: Season Two, Part One as well as Mr. Magoo: The Television Collection, 1960-1977, a 11 disk DVD box set. Plan your Christmas list accordingly.

- Hidden camera enthusiasts will want to mark December 15 on your calendar when Impractical Jokers premieres on TruTV.

- Burt Reynolds enthusiasts will want to look out for new episodes of Archer, returning to FX in January, because the legend will be lending his voice to the animated series naturally playing Burt Reynolds.

- According TV Guide readers, Revenge is the best new show of the fall with Persons of Interest and New Girl right behind. Not surprisingly the already canceled H8R ranked dead last.

Thursday, November 03, 2011

Lay Me Down, Let the Only Sound Be the Overflow

Cerimonials - Florence + the Machine

Singers are a dime a dozen these days, just check out all the crappy karaoke shows that litter the networks these day. Very few singers use or can even use their voice like an instrument, and you can count Florence Welsh of Florence + The Machine as one of them. Her voice demands your attention from the first note managing the most controlled screams you will ever hear and turns them into some of the most beautiful sounds you will ever hear.

Now Florence and her Machine are back for their sophomore outing Ceremonials which is full with more anthemic songs with easy to chant along with choruses. At the top of this list is the epic What the Water Gave Me which soars from start to finish with Florence’s sweeping vocals backed by a frantic barrage of piano and fuzzed out guitars. Seven Devils is as spooky as the song title would suggest and will haunt you long after the last note has played (though not as haunting as her rendition of Addicted to Love). Lover to Lovers sounds like something Aretha Franklin would have recorded in the eighties, but Florence manages to keep it from going into the cheesy way pop music from that decade can easily go into. Ceremonials end with Leave My Body which sounds like the culmination everything the group was trying to make the album be.

If there is a complaint about the album is maybe Ceremonials is too epic that it almost becomes cumbersome. When you get through the hour long album it feels as if you had been listening to it all day. The album could be one of those that you buy at an MP3 outlet so you can through it on in shuffle to have other artist songs buffer the songs from this set. Ceremonials is also missing an upbeat danceable song along the lines Dog Days Are Over and You Got the Love to break up the monotony of the otherwise stellar tracks. Maybe producer Paul Epworth, who produced half of their debut Lungs (and most notably Adele’s Rolling in the Deep) returned to produce this entire album maybe only good at crafting anthemic tunes which is why all of Ceremonials comes across that way. Though maybe not the best album to listen all the way through, any of these songs would may a great addition to any playlist.

Song to Download – What the Water Gave Me

Ceremonials gets a Terror Alert Level: High [ORANGE] on my Terror Alert Scale.

Wednesday, November 02, 2011

I Want My Music Television - 11/2/11

There have been a couple of videos that have caught my eye lately so I thought I’d give them some love since the death of Musical Television left a void for a forum on the art form. If you are interested in buying the video through iTunes, click the title link (where available). If you are interested in buying the song, look for a link in the analysis.

Lonely Boy – The Black Keys

Much like the Funkasauras Rex starring video from their last album, apparently this is not the official music video for the lead single off the new Black Keys album, but it is as equally awesome. I cannot stop watch and may not until El Camino is released December 6. And for those late to the Black Keys music, their second album Thickfreakness is currently on sale for $5 on Amazon MP3.

We All Go Back to Where We Belong – R.E.M.

Sure there is also a Kirsten Dunst version of this R.E.M. video, but since she was already in Savage Garden video, so I will give the John Version some love, whoever he is.

Children – VV Brown featuring Chiddy

Between VV Brown and My Morning Jacket it has been a very entertaining years for children’s choirs. I still cannot decide which one is catchier.

Bonfire – Childish Gambino

So Childish Gambino (aka Troy from Community) wakes up with a noose, in his own woman’s t-shirt. Alrighty. But bonus points for the Toejam and Earl reference.

Tuesday, November 01, 2011

Bend Through Alleys and Bounce off all the Buildings

Garfield at the Macy's Thanksgiving Parade

Holidays are about tradition and n two holidays are steeped in more tradition than Thanksgiving and Christmas. For the former, the day always starts off with some with some cinnamon rolls while watching the Macy’s Thanksgiving Parade, which is this month’s induction into the Scooter Hall of Fame. Then a trip to a relative for some turkey, football, and cards, not necessarily in that order.

Parades are all about childhood wonderment with floats only as limited as a five year old’s imagination. Every small town has one with the local marching band, fire trucks, and local businesses and politicians who try to endear themselves to adults by bribing their kids (and lefts face it the adults too) with candy. But as really the only national one, the Macy’s Thanksgiving Parade is much grander and everything is bigger, the marching bands are better, and of course the balloons, from Garfield to the recently introduced Shrek all the way back to the very first balloon Felix the Cat, introduced all the way back in 1927. Look out for Sonic the Hedgehodge in his very first Macy’s Parade later this month.

Sure in recent years the parade went from a who’s who of celebrity appearance to me asking “Who?” through the parade, but it is hard to break tradition. So come the 24th, I will surely wake up, put some cinnamon rolls in the oven, and turn on NBC for its 85th airing of the American tradition. Here’s hoping I actually recognize someone other than Al Roker this year.

Monday, October 31, 2011

9 Shows From the 90's That Need a Reboot

This month saw the return of Beavis & Butt-head along with Pop Up Video after decade long absences and this weekend, Fox announced they were dusting off their sketch comedy show In Living Color not seen on the channel since 1994. I guess we have to thank the resurgence of the show to Antoine Merriweather who is still going strong on The Sing-Off. Now I have had a long standing boycott of Fox and have not watched a non-football program on the show since the series finale of Arrested Development, but if Damon Wayans, David Allen Grier, and Tommy Davidson all return (while Shawn and Marlon do not), I may have to lift the ban. Currently there are two specials planned and if they do well, possibly a full season will also be ordered.

With the return of those three shows it is apparently that Hollywood has run out of properties to exploit from the eighties (sadly Greatest American Hero was overlooked for a reboot) and moved onto the nineties. So I have decided to make a few suggestions from the grunge decade that networks should resurrect.

1. Ren & Stimpy - If Beavis and Butt-Head are back, can these guys be too far behind?

2. My Two Dads – To those that are too young to remember this show, no, My Two Dads was not the first television show to feature a gay couple in its main cast ever, the premise of the show was actually that a woman had sex with two dudes in the span of a week, got pregnant, and died, and since the judge did not determine who was the dad, he awarded custody to both of the potential father. You can even bring Staci Keanan as the judge.

3. Parker Lewis Can't Lose – The show when head to head with the television spin off of Ferris Bueller (starring Jennifer Aniston) in 1990 and ran for sixty more episodes and actually caught the spirit of Ferris Bueller’s Day off more than the spin off did.

4. Get a Life – A before its time gem from the mind of Chris Elliot as a thirty-something who still lives with his parents (played by his actual dad). Now that Chris has a grown daughter (Abby from Saturday Night Live). Why would FX reboot Anger Management with Charlie Sheen when they could possibly reboot Get a Life?

5. Quantum Leap – Sure the period piece shows have crashed and burned this year, but they were lacking one major aspect: time travel. And since he is free, Scott Backula can return and the first episode is his last “leap” then he takes over for Al with a new leaper, say the soon to be unemployed Zach Levi (assuming Timothy Olyphant is not available anytime soon).

6. Out of This World – NBC has been so low in recently years it is hard to believe that not only did they dominate the rating, they even expanded prime time to 7:30 one season. That lasted about as long as The Jay Leno Hour, but it did produce one success, Out of This World. Starring one of my first crushes, Maureen Flannigan, as a half alien / half human who has powers such as stopping time by just touching her fingers together. Quality entertainment this was.

7. Double Dare – Adding to the nineties nostalgia is Teen Nick which is re-airing shows from the decade such as Clarrissa Explains it All, well here is an idea for Nickelodeon, how about bringing back your great game show Double Dare (and / or its companion show Family Double Dare which I would steal a family to appear on). Actually, how about bringing back all your game shows like Guts and Legend of the Hidden Temple?

8. Herman’s Head – The biggest problem The CW faces is that it thinks it’s a real network and tries to compete with the Big Four networks by scheduling like them, but with younger casts. What made Fox such a player in the nineties (besides obviously getting football) was airing shows that took risks, none of the Big Three back then would have ever ordered up The Simpsons or Married...with Children, and they went on to be massive hits. So instead of creating more brooding teenager shows that will get doubled in the ratings by Telemundo, it is time for The CW to think outside the box much like when Fox created a sitcom that took place in a dude’s heads whose cast included the Wimp, the Angle, the Animal, and Genius part of a brain.

9. MTV Rock and Jock – I assuming the reason why the Rock and Jock specials went away was because of the skyrocketing contracts of the decade, but instead of current major leaguers, just bring in retired players that need the money. Like Darryl Strawberry or Aintoine Walker whould say no. And without any NBA this year, what a perfect time to bring it back. Also who doesn’t want to see if Flea still has it.

Since Hollywood has just started to ransack the ninties cubboard, let me warn them of a couple shows they should never reboot under any circumstance.

1. The Fresh Prince of Bel Air – This this sounds like a good idea until you realize they would just cast Soulja Boy or even worse, Will Smith forces the casting directors to sign up his son.

2. The X-Files – If the post-David Duchovny era was not evidence enough, I do not know what else could convince you not to do the show without him.

3. Beverly Hills, 90210 – Umm, which leads me to…

4. Dawson's Creek, Party of Five, Felicity or Any Other Show From The WB: Seriously The CW, before thinking about it, go back and reread what I wrote during Herman’s Head.

5. Friends – Hollywood has tried to recreate Friends success since it became a hit and has failed massively every time (with the exception of How I Met Your Mother) and a Friends remake would doubtfully do any better.

Sunday, October 30, 2011

57 Channels and Only This Is On - 10/30/11

The Walking Dead: That starting flashback scene was worthless, we already knew about the pre-apocalypse marital problems; really all we got were some worthless reaction shots and no early zombies. But my favorite part of the episode is when the old guy wondered why they did not find any high grade antibiotics while scavenging on the highway, as if that is a common travel kit. Almost as entertaining as the new accent they gave Vivian Volcoff to master, but instead go in and out of.
You can stream recent episodes over at You can also download The Walking Dead on iTunes.

How I Met Your Mother: First off, let’s quickly touch on the bad, that was the creepiest episode ever. EVER. I need to drink away the visuals as soon as possible. With that out of the way, why did Ted not call me about the “Weird Al” tickets? I would have totally gone with him.
You can stream recent episodes over at You can also download How I Met Your Mother on iTunes.

The Sing Off: The Collective has continually been on the bottom of my Power Rankings all season, and I was glad they finally landed in the final two, but I was surprised they actually lost the final sing-off because I thought they did a better version of Just a Dream than The Yellowjackets (who did not deserve to be in the bottom two). But the bif news of the week was Antoine Merriweather grinding on a girl!

The Sing-Off Week 4 Power Rankings (change from last week in parentheses):

1. Afro Blue (-)
2. The Dartmouth Aires (+2)
3. University of Rochester YellowJackets (-1)
4. Urban Method (-1)
5. BYU Vocal Point (-)
6. Delilah (-)
7. Pentatonix (-)

You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download songs from The Sing-Off on iTunes.

Castle: Having the ex-cop being the killer seemed like one too many twists in the episode. But it was still entertaining hearing Castle trying to rationalize an otherworldly killer.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Castle on iTunes.

Sons of Anarchy: Back when we went down south to meet the other patch and how one member killed another that was going to play out in SAMCRO and it finally played out this episode. It should be interesting to hear how Clay explains the bullets in Piney’s chest next episode and who buys it (Gemma already knows he is lying and will likely put the two together). But you have to wonder why Piney, knowing Clay would come after him, hide in the one place Clay would look?
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Sons of Anarchy on iTunes.

Survivor: South Pacific: When the show returned this season, I unveiled the 25 Dumbest Survivor Contestants Ever with Ozzy surprisingly left off the list despite being voted off with an Idol in his back pocket. But if he loses this week I’ll will have to update the list because he will have definably jumped into the top five. What makes his move so dumb is that it was totally unnecessary because Christine has made it abundantly clear she hates her own tribe, so had she beaten Cochran, she would have joined them out of spite, she certainly is not as Christian as Matt last season. So best case scenario for his move is a zero sum gain. And then the worst case scenario is not only he loses and is out of the game not even making it to the jury, but maybe he wins but there is no merge and his tribe loses the Immunity Challenge without him, Cochran, as bottom on the totem poll, uses the Hidden Immunity Idol at tribal council and Keith is voted out and now Ozzy has to battle him at Redemption Island, and even if he wins that and reenters the game, he returns to a tribe down numbers and without an Idol. Oh, please, Reality Gods, let this scenario play out.
You can stream recent episodes over at

Survivor on iTunes

Revenge: How long until Amy Abbott gets rid of her boyfriend’s little troll of her boyfriend friend. He may not be on the list, but he has to be meeting his demise sooner than later.
You can stream current episodes on Hulu. You can also download Revenge on iTunes.

Community: Yeah, there was nothing more predictable than the whole study had major mental issues. With that said, Annie is one heck of a storyteller.
You can stream current episodes on Hulu. You can also download Community on iTunes.

Beavis and Butt-Head: When they announced the return of the show I feared it would have lost its magic in the years since they left MTV but they did not miss a beat. And since they are watching actual television shows no, is it too much to ask to have the boys watch the presidential debate?
You can stream recent episodes over at You can also download Beavis and Butt-Head on iTunes.

Chuck: With last season’s cliffhanger, I feared the show would become unbearable with Morgan as the Intercet and that was basically how that played out. Hopefully they have more Sarah in her undergarment scenes to dull the pain this season and they save the inevitable baby announcement to the series finale. And I and still not sure what the evil CIA guy’s endgame is. Hopefully they clear that up soon.
You can stream current episodes on Hulu. You can also download Chuck on iTunes.