Showing posts with label Grand Theft Auto. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Grand Theft Auto. Show all posts

Tuesday, September 17, 2013

The 100 Greatest Songs Featured in Grand Theft Auto

Today sees the release of Grand Theft Auto V which is rumored to have over four hundred songs including in the game (compared to just over six hundred in the previous games combined). Of course by the time you read this, you will probably find the exact songs somewhere on the internets and this list will already be outdated because it only covers songs featured up to Grand Theft Auto IV. You can listen to this list on Spotify at right.

1. Nuthin' but a "G" Thang - Dr. Dre featuring Snoop Doggy Dogg

2. Sister Christian - Night Ranger

3. Billie Jean - Michael Jackson

4. Free Bird - Lynyrd Skynyrd

5. In the Air Tonight - Phil Collins

6. Cult of Personality - Living Colour

7. Running with the Night - Lionel Richie

8. I Know You Got Soul - Eric B. and Rakim

9. Strange Times - The Black Keys

10. Tempted - Squeeze

11. I Want to Know What Love Is - Foreigner

12. Killing In the Name - Rage Against the Machine

13. Children's Story - Slick Rick

14. The Message - Grandmaster Flash and the Furious Five

15. 1979 - The Smashing Pumpkins

16. Blue Monday - New Order

17. Poison - Bell Biv DeVoe

18. Welcome to the Jungle - Guns N' Roses

19. Wanna Be Startin' Somethin' - Michael Jackson

20. Express Yourself - N.W.A.

21. Wishing Well - Terence Trent D'Arby

22. I'll Be There for You / You're All I Need to Get By - Method Man featuring Mary J. Blige

23. It Takes Two - Rob Base and DJ E-Z Rock

24. Relax - Frankie Goes to Hollywood

25. Remedy - The Black Crowes

26. Bump N' Grind - R. Kelly

27. I Love a Rainy Night - Eddie Rabbitt

28. Out of Touch - Hall and Oates

29. Run to You - Bryan Adams

30. Edge of Seventeen - Stevie Nicks

31. Check Yo Self ('The Message' Remix) - Ice Cube featuring Das EFX

32. Get At Me Dog - DMX and Sheek

33. Motownphilly - Boyz II Men

34. (Explative Deleted) Wit Dre Day (And Everybody's Celebratin') - Dr. Dre featuring Snoop Doggy Dogg

35. Freek'n You - Jodeci

36. My Lovin' (You're Never Gonna Get It) - En Vogue

37. Sexual Healing - Marvin Gaye

38. The One Thing - INXS

39. Barracuda - Heart

40. Self Control - Laura Branigan

41. Gloria - Laura Branigan

42. A Horse With No Name - America

43. Waiting for a Girl Like You - Foreigner

44. Africa - Toto

45. I Ran (So Far Away) - A Flock of Seagulls

46. Love Is a Battlefield - Pat Benatar

47. Low Rider - War

48. Crazy - Willie Nelson

49. Working for the Weekend - Loverboy

50. Sunglasses at Night - Corey Hart

51. Voices Carry - Til Tuesday

52. It Was a Good Day - Ice Cube

53. Something About You - Level 42

54. Cum On Feel the Noize - Quiet Riot

55. Nightshift - The Commodores

56. Don't Be Cruel - Bobby Brown

57. Inner City Blues (Make Me Wanna Holler) - Marvin Gaye

58. I'm Not In Love - 10cc

59. Queen of Hearts - Juice Newton

60. Two Tickets to Paradise - Eddie Money

61. I Can Dream About You - Dan Hartman

62. Baby Hold On - Eddie Money

63. Maneater - Hall and Oates

64. Wanted Dead or Alive - Bon Jovi

65. How I Could Just Kill a Man - Cypress Hill

66. Unsung - Helmet

67. Green Onions - Booker T. and The MG's

68. Personal Jesus - Depeche Mode

69. I Wanna Rock - Twisted Sister

70. Evil Woman - Electric Light Orchestra

71. Heart of Glass - Blondie

72. The Warrior - Scandel

73. Alwayz Into Somethin' - N.W.A.

74. In a Big Country - Big Country

75. You Dropped a Bomb On Me - Gap Band

76. Young Turks - Rod Stewart

77. We Belong - Pat Benatar

78. Movin' On Up - Primal Scream

79. Rock You Like a Hurricane - Scorpions

80. Green River - Creedence Clearwater Revival

81. Easy Lover - Philip Bailey and Phil Collins

82. Broken Wings - Mr. Mister

83. Deep Cover - Dr. Dre and Snoop Doggy Dogg

84. Footsteps In the Dark, Pts. 1 and 2 - The Isley Brothers

85. Keep On Loving You - REO Speedwagon

86. Buffalo Stance - Neneh Cherry

87. Owner of a Lonely Heart - Yes

88. (I Just) Died in Your Arms - Cutting Crew

89. Turn You Inside-Out - R.E.M.

90. Renegade - Styx

91. Tainted Love - Gloria Jones

92. Harden My Heart - Quarterflash

93. Steppin' Out - Joe Jackson

94. You've Got Another Thing Comin' - Judas Priest

95. One Thing Leads to Another - The Fixx

96. Plush - Stone Temple Pilots

97. Between the Sheets - The Isley Brothers

98. The Payback - James Brown

99. White Wedding (Part 1) - Billy Idol

100. Runnin' Down a Dream - Tom Petty

Sunday, September 01, 2013

To Succeed in Life You Must Eliminate Everything in Your Path in a Blind Rage

Grand Theft Auto

I have never really been into violent video games (unless you count the old school hockey games where you could break open a dude’s skull and watch them bleed on the ice) and spent most of my time playing games like Mario Kart, Final Fantasy, and sports games. So I did not think much of the first two Grand Theft Auto games and even ignored the huge buzz around the third game which essentially invented the sandbox game (ironically instead I bought The Simpsons rip off game which thankfully was a lot more entertaining than their Double Dragon rip-off Nintendo game). But the ad campaigned for Grand Theft Auto: Vice City drew me in with its Miami Vice vibe and A Flock of Seagulls soundtrack which it is why the franchise is this month's induction into the Scooter Hall of Fame.

Forget the video game violence; Vice City was worth it just for the soundtrack along, I would have just been content with just driving around the sprawling faux Miami just listening to the awesomely eighties radio stations (Lionel Richie! Hall and Oates!! Squeeze!!!) and to those that always rag on the violent storyline, there is nothing making you going around shooting people and picking up hookers, you could steal a taxi and play Crazy Taxi style or earn a living hunting down criminals for the police or hijacking an ambulance to help people to the hospital on time.

Okay, I am not that altruistic, I also partook in the more violent storylines too. But the Grand Theft Auto games are just like playing a movie. III was basically The Godfather, Vice City is a retelling of Scarface, and San Andreas is like playing Boys in the Hood. Of course to the parents out there, if you do not let your kids watch those types of movies, you definitely should not let your kids play these types of games. And if you do let your kids watch those types of movies and play these types of games, you really need a visit from child services.

Even if you do choose the dark side (that is where the main storylines are anyway) there are consequences. If you kill someone, the police will come after you. And if you continue to kill people, the more the pursue you until the call in S.W.A.T., helicopters, and if you stay on the lamb long enough while you continue your killing spree they will even bring in an armored tank. And once you are caught, you have to pay your way out of prison or pay a hospital bill defending on how they get you.

As great as Vice City was, San Andreas was even better in almost every since way except maybe the soundtrack (it is hard to choose between cheesy eighties music and the mix of early nineties gangsta rap and alternative rock. The opening local, which was a fictional version of Compton was probably even bigger than Vice City then throughout the game you could travel to San Francisco and Las Vegas (where you can even gamble) surrogates. There was even the countryside, a mountain, a couple of small suburbs, and a desert with its own Area 51 type secret government facility where you could steal a jet pack. Seriously, how cool is a jet pack? Sure not all the additions were inspired, requiring players to eat was annoying, and then when you ate too much, you were unable to run and the weight training was just as silly.

Expectations were high when Grand Theft Auto leaped onto the next generation council and GTA IV more than lived up to the hype. Where the previous installments were clearly inspired by iconic movies, the new version followed an eastern European immigrant trying to find his way in the new world by any means necessary. And since this was he first in seven years to be set in current times and this time around you had access to a cell phone (complete with a camera) and if you stole a car that a soccer mom would drive it probably would be equipped with a GPS devise. And there were so many ways to get around Liberty City (basically NYC) with five distinctive boroughs, aside from the obvious car, there is the subway, boats, and you could even commandeer a helicopter, just remember to bring your parachute just in case you have to bail.

When you were done with the game, there were two downloads featuring new storylines for Liberty city. The Lost and the Damned has you as the leader of a biker gang who needs to keep its turf while The Ballad of Gay Tony saw you employed as a body guard for the titular nightclub owner who was just as ruthless as his female loving counterparts. Each game was almost as expansive as the original and actually managed to intertwine with each other. Then there was even more fun when you fired up the modem and go online for deathmatches, street races, and other fun game. You could still occasionally find me in a Turf War waiting room.

Much like many of Rockstar Games, little is known about Grand Theft Auto V out later this month (look for a list of The 100 Greatest Song from Grand Theft Auto coming from me around the release date, unfortunately that list will be instantly outdated the moment it is published as there is said to be 240 licensed songs for the new game). The game does return to San Andreas but consider how much Liberty City changed from GTA III to GTA IV, the fake west coast will probably look radically different than the PS2 game, it is said to be bigger and the original San Andreas and GTA IV combined, and even more ways to get around (ATV’s! jet skies!!). There will also be three lead characters you can toggle between, a first for the series. One apparently will even own a dog which, depending on your actions, can get lost or even die. While the online mode looks to be even more expansive. Grand Theft Auto V (as well as my list of The 100 Greatest Songs from Grand Theft Auto) comes out on the 17th.

Friday, January 04, 2013

The Thirteen Events That Will Make 2013 Awesome

Thirteen is supposed to be an unlucky number, but there are a few things worth looking forward to the thirteenth year of this decade.

13. Detox – Dr. Dre: It is becoming an annual tradition to start off this list by saying this may be the year Dr. Dre finally releases Detox, but considering he was not able to get it out before the Mayan apocalypse, I think it is a safe bet to take the over on the release of Detox compared to any other event, be it the Cubs winning the World Series, a Veronica Mars movie, or Hayden Panettiere winning an acting award. It does not help that last year 50 Cent said that Dr. Dre is no longer interested in Detox (much like the general public) and it may just be released as an EP at some point.

12. The Mayans Were Wrong (Probably): Sure we are in the unlucky thirteen year, but hey, we are still here. Unless of course you did not think the world was going to explode in mid-December and instead the world would die slowly and we were too busy looking for some big apocalypse we missed the small catalyst that will being on the end of the world as we know it. Since you are still alive, make sure you go out and enjoy life this year. I would say that you only live once, but I do not want to get sued by Drake. Plus Nancy Sinatra is significantly better than Drake and she said you only live twice.

11. Sequels That Won’t Suck (Hopefully): The Last Exorcism 2 (March 1), Kick-(Expletive Deleted) 2 (June 28), Grown Ups 2 (July 12), RED 2 (August 2), Percy Jackson Sea of Monsters (August 16), Sin City: A Dame to Kill For (October 4), and Thor: The Dark World (November 8) all had entertaining to great original films and statistically speaking a couple of the seven will probably have a good serial. Okay I do not have high hopes for the second The Last Exorcism because, well, it is an oxymoron but hopefully the other live up to the first movies or at the very least half of them do.

10. S.H.E.I.L.D. the TV Series: Joss Whedon back doing television would be awesome enough, but continuing his work in the Marvel universe makes this doubly awesome. The only way it could have been more awesome is if Lizzy Caplain, who starred in the Item 47 short film, would have continued her character on the new show (she is otherwise busy, but more on her later). No superheroes on the television show (unless you count the reanimated corpse of Phil Coulson) and a cast of unknowns but I have full faith in Whedon. Hopefully the show will be ready by the fall and does not flutter out like the Wonder Woman reboot that never ended up making it to air.

9. No National Elections: I am sure most of those that live in the United States do care either way, but for those of us living in swing states, no political ads or robocalls are very welcome in this off election year. Unfortunately it looks like 2016 will be worse than last year because Sheldon Adelson, who may have been the biggest loser after backing numerous losing candidates with what is believed to be over $100 million (almost a dollar for every vote cast), plans to double down in the future.

8. Man of Steel: I am still cautiously optimistic about the latest Superman reboot. Zack Snyder’s last movie was so poorly received that there was a groundswell to kick him off the movie. I love Christopher Nolan’s Batman movies, but as executive producer of the movie I fear he may make Superman more serious than he should be. But on the flipside, it cannot possible be worse than the Krypton in the Atlantic Ocean plot from Superman Returns. Can it? We will find out June 28.

7. A New U2 Album: Ever since U2 released No Line on the Horizon in 2009, the group has been teasing that the session had enough songs for another new album which they even dubbed Songs of Accent. That album has yet to materialize but the group, but their record company announced that they would be releasing a new album this year. No word on if the album will be Songs of Ascent, work they have done with Danger Mouse, or a dance album they have also supposedly been working on.

6. Warm Bodies: After Zombieland I declared the 10’s (the tens? The teens? What exactly are we calling this decade?) the decade of zombies. Since then there has been numerous movies, even the kids in The Cabin In The Woods ended up summoning zombies, The Walking Dead is crushing cable ratings records, and thanks to the bath salt epidemic that created actual living zombies. Of course there would eventually be someone who would come along and bastardize zombies with a crappy Twilight with zombies type movie. At least that is what I thought Warm Bodies was going to be until I saw the trailer and, surprise, not only did it not look painfully bad, it actually looked like it will be good. Warm Bodies, coming February 1, is not the only major zombie movie making its way to theaters this year as the oft delayed Brad Pitt World War Z is set to premiere this summer.

5. The Evil Dead: Does the world need a reboot of The Evil Dead? No. Even if Sam Raimi is involved? Not really. Does it need one where Ash is a chick? Goodness no. Even if it is the chick from Suburgatory? Probably not. Will I get excited if this movie leads to Tessa Altman vs. The Army of Darkness? Frack yes!

4. More From The Black Keys: The duo just released El Camino thirteen months ago but it does not sound like we will have to wait very much longer for the next album as the band expects it to be done by the end of Spring. It seems like only Rihanna releases as much music (seven in eight years), but where a Rihanna album is lucky to have one to three catchy songs, The Black Keys always release great albums. No word yet if the album will again be produced by Danger Mouse, who did two of the band’s last three albums.

3. Gangster Squad: After watching Crazy, Stupid, Love, I decreed that every movie should star Emma Stone and Ryan Gosling. Apparently someone was listening because the duo will be playing opposite each other in the period piece set to hit theaters next week. I am sure the duo could even make an Innerspace reboot awesome (McLovin of course would then play Martin Short, make this happen Hollywood).

2. Grand Theft Auto V: After all the massacres, people wondered if the upcoming Grand Theft Auto will be the last of its kind. It is doubtful as long as there is money to be made. And it is always cheap to blame entertainment for society’s ills when it is the parents that should be accountable for letting their kids to watch or play such violent games. I have played all four GTA games released on the two Playstation games and remain fiercely anti-gun. Plus the games are not all bad, you can also steal ambulances and cop cars and do good through the city. GTA V takes the game out west to San Andreas for the first time in modern times and the first modern game to take place outside of Liberty City. Little else is known about the game except it is supposed to be even bigger than the fourth installment and it is expected to be released sometime this spring.

1. Masters of Sex – Seriously, Lizzy Caplan is starring in something entitled Masters of Sex. The show cannot premiere soon enough (but will probably hit Showtime no sooner than April).

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Lyrics Quiz: Grand Theft Auto

Just to show how bad things have gotten for the music industry, in one day, Grand Theft Auto IV sold more games than all but one album sold in all of 2007. Ironically, one of the things that makes the game so enjoyable is that you can just cruise around in your car listening to music. I have found myself playing the game sitting in the car waiting for the song to end before I got out of the car to get some hot coffee. This month’s quiz is dedicated to songs that can be found in a previous GTA games. As always you need to put both artist and title in the comments section (or you can e-mail me) and if you are correct I will un-bold it and give you credit. The Lyrics Quiz is for entertainment purposes only so please do not use anything besides your own meandering mind to help you up with the answers. Now onto the quiz:

1. Reaching out for something to hold, looking for a love where the climate is cold. Manic moves and drowsy dreams or living in the middle between the two extremes. (Out of Touch - Hall and Oates; guessed by Dara)
2. I am the one who would dance on the floor in a round. (Billie Jean - Michael Jackson; guessed by Angie)
3. Oh, the night is my world. City light, painted girl. (Self Control - Laura Branigan; guessed by Angie)
4. I know her love is true, but it is so damn easy making love to you. (Run to You - Bryan Adams; guessed by Angie)
5. We are young but getting old before our time. We’ll leave the TV and radio behind.
6. Heart of the city street is beating. Light from the neon’s turning dark today.
7. So you think my singing’s out of time: it makes me money. I don’t know why.
8. I said to my reflection, “Let’s get out of this place.” (Tempted - Squeeze - guessed by Dara)
9. Diary sits by the bedside table. Curtains are closed, cat’s in a cradle. ((I Just) Died in Your Arms - Cutting Crew; guessed by Angie)
10. Baby it’s all I know that you’re half the flesh and blood that makes me whole. (Broken Wings - Mr. Mister; guesed by Angie)
11. And so the conversation turned until the sun went down. And many fantasies were learned on that day. ((Keep Feelin ) Fascination - Human League; guessed by Angie)
12. Ladies love me; girls adore me I mean even the ones that never seen me like the way that I rhyme at a show. (It Takes Two - Rob Base and D.J. E-Z Rock; guessed by Angie)
13. Your bark was loud, but your bite wasn't vicious and them rhymes you were kicking were quite bootylicious.
14. Some drop science, well I’m dropping English.
15. Lovers, I know you've had a few. But hide your heart beneath the covers and tell 'em they're the only one.
16. Worried, why do I let myself worry. Wondering what in the world did I do? (Crazy - Willie Nelson; guessed by Dara)
17. I love to hear the thunder, watch the lightning when it lights up the sky. You know it makes me feel good. (I Love a Rainy Night - Eddie Rabbit; guessed by Angie)
18. Patti gave birth to a ten pound baby boy. (Young Turks - Rod Stewart; guessed by Angie)
19. Got a surprise especially for you, something that both of us have always wanted to do. We’ve waited so long. (Two Tickets to Paradise - Eddie Money; guessed by Dara)
20. After three days, in the desert fun, I was looking at a river bed and the story it told, of a river that flowed made me sad to think it was dead. (A Horse with No Name - America; guessed by Angie)
21. Never trust a big butt and a smile. (Poison - Bell Biv DeVoe; guessed by Angie)
22. From fancy cars to diamond rings, I've just about given you everything. There’s really not much I won't do for you. I bought you twelve yellow roses and candy, too. (Don't Be Cruel - Bobby Brown; guessed by Angie)
23. If you got the money, honey, we got your disease. (Welcome to the Jungle - Guns n' Roses; guessed by Angie)
24. Neon lights, Nobel Prize. When a leader speaks, that leader dies. (Cult of Personality - Living Colour; guessed by Dara)
25. Where you going with the mask I found? (Plush - Stone Temple Pilots; guessed by Angie)

Friday, July 29, 2005

Hopefully Grandma Will Get Run Over By a Reindeer

Grand Theft AutoA couple days ago, I posted a tidbit on Hilary Clinton fight against Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas (check out my review – Welcome to the Jungle). Well it seem that another old, dumb, woman is joining the fight. A grandmother from the Bronx has filed a civil suit Wednesday for engaged in false, misleading and deceptive practices. A quick recap of the hoopla – you can find a key on the internet that can unlock a scene involving two digital characters having sex. The grandmother bought the game for her 14 year old grandson and is now distraught that her grandson would be witness to such an act. Keep in mind, on the cover (see right) there are pictures depicting multiple guns, gambling, gang colors, and a woman in a bikini licking her lips while on the back there are more guns and text talking about “dealers and gangbangers.” It is also clearly stated that the game is rated M for Mature (17+) and contains Blood and Gore, Intense Violence, Strong Language, Strong Sexual Content, and Use of Drugs. Keep in mind she bought this for a 14 year old. Even without a sex scene, a 14 year old shouldn’t be playing this. I haven’t found out if this grandmother is the legal guardian for the kid, but if she is, and I was social services, I would take that kid away from her.

One of the few things I agree with George Bush on is the need to get rid of frivolous lawsuits and this case is warranted. The only problem is, like many of his campaign promises, he has yet to do anything about this. It time to stand up and get rid of this frivolous lawsuit, and ones like it and then go after the real culprit, the grandmother for buying the kid the game in the first place even with the 17+ warning on it. Of course if she wins, I’ll have no problem collecting my portion of the payout. And it will set a presentiment that will let me sue the makers of Who Framed Rodger Rabbit for adding a from of a naked Jessica Rabbit in their movie, the makers of The Little Mermaid for inserting multiple phallic symbols in their movie, and the makers of White Chicks for stealing 90 minutes of my life that I can never get back.

Friday, July 22, 2005

Musings From the Back 9 vol. VII

kanyeWest_125x125I mentioned a while back that Kanye West’s remix (with Jay-Z) to the song Diamond (From Sierra Leone) and how it talked about the atrocities that happen just to bring your bling to the US (Throw Up Your Diamonds Like You’re Bulimic). If you haven’t read that already, I highly recommend it. Also if you were interesting to hear the song for yourself, the remix is now currently available on iTunes. I can’t recommend this song enough.

After week of doing insane stunk after insane stunt, Tom Cruise have finally did something of importance, he pissed off the French. It was reported recently the Cruise is no long welcome in the country. Welcome back to humanity Tom.

There was a lot of backlash with John McCain appearing in the R-rated movie, Wedding Crashers with Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson. One reporter even printed a title reading “Sen. McCain stars in ‘boob raunch fest.’” McCain responded by saying, “In Washington, I work with boobs everyday.” He even seemed more upset that he appeared in the same movie as James Carville than with a bunch of boobs. So all the prudes out there that think this is a bad thing, relax, and go see the movie because it’s hilarious. Not to mention, McCain gave his entire paycheck from the film to charity.

Speaking of boob raunch fest, it looks like Mike Tyson is looking at getting into porn. He has already contacted Jenna Jemison’s production company. Just when you think Tyson couldn’t get any more entertaining, he always seems to out do himself.

cooterMuch like me, it seems like the original Cooter from wants you to boycott the new movie. Now I think people should boycott the movie because it doesn’t star
and . Cooter on the other hand doen’t want people to see it because Hollywood is sleezing up a “family show.” I was unaware that rasist imagry, short shorts, and dudes named Cooter qualify as family entertainment. Does he even know what Cooter means? But it looks like family values to Cooter (at right) is having girls that could be you daughter rub up against you.

It appears that Hilary 2008 is in full swing when the Senator attacked for having a hidden scene with a naked woman. So let me get this straight, in the Clinton household, dudes blowing each other up with rocket launchers – O.K. Naked pixilated women – bad.

Weird search of the week:
arab chick stereotypes forums (AOL)

Here are the results of the Live 8 Lyrics Quiz that were not guessed:

13. She couldn’t afford a car so she named her daughter Alexis. (All Falls Down – Kanye West)
18. I can’t wait for the first time. My imagination is running wild. (You Don’t Know My Name – Alicia Keys)
20. You’re talking so much sex, but you’re not telling us about AIDS. (It Takes More – Ms. Dynamite)
23. She said her name was Donnie but her shirt said Marie. (Then She Bit Me – DJ Jazzy Jeff & the Fresh Prince)

Congratulations to for make the most correct answers (4). Since this was fairly successful, I will be bringing back a new lyrics quiz with a new theme on the 15th of every month. I have also put up a winner’s circle in the margin so be sure to come back each month (or just come back everyday) to try your hand at the new lyrics quiz.

Tuesday, June 07, 2005

Welcome to the Jungle

Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas

To commemorate the release of the XBOX version of Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas, I thought I would whip out a review albeit for the Playstation 2. (As I type this out on Microsoft Word, I find it very interesting that XBOX makes it through spell check yet Playstation doesn’t. Isn’t that taking it too far Bill?) Keep in mind I currently hovering around 70% after playing since January so I do not have a full review as the finish can sometimes make or break a game. There is nothing worse than spending a lot of time on a decent to good game only to have a lackluster ending (*cough Star Wars: Bounty Hunter cough*). But I do have a good feel to the game as I have been playing it for almost half a year.

Just like the recently reviewed Desperate Housewives (scroll down one entry), I avoided the Grand Theft Auto series as all the review for GTA3 all revolved around the ability to have your way with a hooker only to kill her and get your money back. Not necessarily my idea of fun, but anyways. Then the ads for GTA: Vice City came out. I’m sure we all remember the Miami Vice look-a-likes strolling around with explosions going of in the background and slick cars flying through the air to the sounds of A Flock of Seagulls’ I Ran. I have to admit I was excited as a child of the 80’s and a lover of anything from the decade. But then I remembered the whole hooker thing. Then I came across the soundtrack to GTA:VC featuring such great 80’s artist as Michael Jackson, Bryan Adams, Laura Branigan, Twisted Sister, Night Ranger, and my personal favorite, Lionel Ritchie. And that just a tip of the iceberg as they about fifty songs that you were able to listen to while driving around Vice City. I even found myself at my destination and I wouldn’t get out of the car because a certain song was on the radio. As for the gameplay, there were many entertaining missions that you go on all different from each other. Although I could have done without the RC missions.

So when I was offered a free copy of GTA: SA (thank you Promosquad, check to your left for a link), I jumped at it. The game this time is set in the early 90’s in a state that resembles California. Yes, there is a state to roam around, not just one city. In fact, the three major cities in the state all seem as big if not bigger than Vice City. In San Andreas, you start out in Los Santos, a Los Angeles type city and Grove Street is your own personal Compton. Next own your journey is San Fierro is a take on San Francisco equipped with hills, a winding street, and a lot of alternative lifestyle hangouts. The last place you will travel is Las Venturas which is the alternative universe version of Las Vegas which basically in California anyways. And that not it, there is an extensive rural element to San Andreas too that is about three times the size of the three major cities combined including a desert, a dam, a mountain, a secret military base, and a couple small towns and farm areas.

The music was the big part of GTA:VC, so it’s only right to start there. Since we are set in the early 90’s LA off-shoot, gangsta rap takes center stage on the radio station Radio Los Santos with eight songs by N.W.A. or N.W.A. alumni. The other major music of the time was grunge and that is put on Radio X with songs by Helmet, Rage Against the Machine, and Alice in Chains. For soul, turn to CSR and you will get contemporary music from En Vogue, Boyz II Men, and Bell Biv DeVoe, with you DJ as voiced by Michael Bivins of BBD and New Edition.

Unlike GTA:VC, SA has a few classic stations too. Playback, with your DJ voiced by Chuck D, features old school rap from Chuck’s Public Enemy, Gang Starr, and Biz Markie. Bounce FM plays classic funk tracks with your DJ, The Funktipus as voiced by George Clinton where you will hear the sounds of Rick James, Ohio Players, and The Gap Band. K-Rose is the country station for when you are traveling around the boondocks. K-DST brings you some classic rock from the likes of Tom Petty, Billy Idol and what classic rock station wouldn't be complete without some Free Bird? And the music is brought to you by none other than W Axl Rose. And quite frankly, he shouldn’t quit his day job of being a recluse. Rounding out the dial is a dance station, a Reggie station, and some talk radio. So the music is not as good as Vice City, but it will keep you entertained, even six months in.

The guest DJ’s are not the only known personalities in the game. First and foremost is Coach Carter himself, Samuel L. Jackson as Officer Tenpenny, a cop so mean that he makes Officer Krupke look like a dancing sissy. His sidekick, Officer Pulaski, is voiced by Chris Penn. I’m sure you all remember him as the hick Kevin Bacon taught to dance in Footloose. The face of the counter-culture, Peter Fonda, plays, of course a hippie who has a distrust of the government (granted my generation best knows him as Bridget's dad). James Woods plays a government agent. Fresh from his True Hollywood Stories, Charlie Murphy makes a funny, albeit short cameo. David Cross from Arrested Development is telecasted as an uber-nerd. Ice-T, The Game, MC Eiht and members of the Boo-Yaa T.R.I.B.E. not surprisingly are cast as ganstas. For the females, they brought in the C-list with Debi Mazar and Bijou Phillips who makes a rare appearance without taking her cloths off.

As for the missions, there are many that closely resemble those that are found in Vice City. Luckily they are only two RC missions here (at least as far as I gone), but the bad new that one of them is the hardest mission ever. Ever. EVER. It took me about a week to finally complete it. It was so excruciatingly painful, I skip watching Arrested Development for a couple weeks because the sound of David Cross’ voice, who is featured in the mission, sent me in to a crazed frenzy. You cannot fully comprehend how horrible this mission is until you play it.

There were some improvements in the game over Vice City as I mention earlier, the massive scale of the state. The biggest change though is that CJ can swim. I could never understand how some one on an island was unable to swim. Also CJ has the ability to climb over walls and such, this comes in handy throughout the game. CJ also has the ability of stealth, stealing a page out of Sam Fisher’s playbook. And since we are roaming around a state, you have the ability to steal airplanes and fly them. And in case you want to bail out of you plane mid-flight, you can strap on a parachute and glide down without becoming a pancake on the sidewalk. Bicycles also make their appearance as a mode of transportation as well as a special “vehicle” that you will steal from the government that I won’t spoil for you.

There is addition that I'm not fond as GTA moves to The Sims territory. I have never understood why anyone would want to play a life simulator why they have there own like to control. In GTA:SA, you must make sure CJ eat or you will eventually lose some health. Also, there gyms you can go to add some muscle mass or just lose some pounds because if you eat too much, CJ slows down and you can't jump as high. There is also a way to increase your sex appeal by getting tattoos, new cloths and new hairstyle of which includes every hair cut a black man has ever worn, I'm partial to the Bobby Brown-Gumby look, and even some they don't use like the Elvis pompadour.

Looking forward to a possible 7th GTA, may I suggest a late 70’s New York type city. At your disposal are music that range between punk and disco. You can also implement a Studio 54 type club, a Son of Sam type character, a blackout, and can fill the game with the type of people who were regulars at Studio 54 (Warhol et. al.). Leave your suggestion for a new GTA in the comments section.

Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas gets a Terror Alert Level: Severe [RED] on my Terror Alert Scale.