The Ten Best Television Shows of 2014-15

For my list of best shows of the year, I only consider shows that finished their seasons between July 2014 and June 2015 so the final season of Mad Men which stupidly was split into half season is finally eligible even though the season started almost seventeen months ago. What is not eligible is the show that topped last year's list Hannibal as it just started its third season. Here are the ten best shows that aired their episodes in the same twelve month periods.

1. Justified 7.x (FX)
2. Masters of Sex 2.x (Showtime)
3. Marvel's Agent Carter (ABC)
4. The Americans 3.x (FX)
5. Homeland 4.x (Showtime)
6. Parenthood 6.x (NBC)
7. Gotham 1.x (FOX)
8. Mad Men 7.x (AMC)
9. Blackish 1.x (ABC)
10. Orphan Black 3.x (BBC America)

Previewing Masters of Sex: Season Three

Late last season on Masters of Sex, Virginia's ex-husband George showed up looking to alter their custody arrangement much to her chagrin. I actually thought he had a good case because at that point I had completely forgotten she had children, they were MIA for most of the season and the only time I even remember them being mentioned was when Libby wanted to piggyback Virginia's babysitter to spend more time with her nanny's brother. It seems like there will not be a lack of Johnson children this season because they have enough of a storyline this year to warrant a title card at the end of each episode (or the very least the first two) letting us know that though the sex study is based on their real research, the children on the show are completely fictitious.

When the Johnson children did pop up at the end of last season during the custody battles I was a bit surprised that with all the time jumping that happen last season (five years had passed since the series started) the kids were played by the same actors that played them in the first season despite the five years that had passed in the time. Since another four year has passed since the end of last they have finally recast the kids to more age appropriate actor. Henry is now seventeen and looking like Steve Rogers before he got his Captain America super powers. While fifteen year old Tessa is now being played by Isabelle Fuhrman (the creepy girl from Orphan who did such a great job in an otherwise mediocre film that I had to go straight to her Wikipedia page to see if she really was a forty year old like her character or an actual teenager like she looked). Focusing more on teenagers has always been a drag on otherwise great television shows, but the best part of the early season is when Ginny suggests Dr. Masters, who has spent his life studying the subject, give Tessa the birds and the bees speech.

This comes when the Johnsons and Masters (who have added a third child since the last episode) descend on a cabin for vacation on the even of their book finally being publish. When we last left Libby she was finally admit her husband was having an affair and it seems like everyone now know this but never speak of it which leads to a bunch of awkward conversations even before the subject of birds and bees is brought up. The end of the premiere bring a bombshell that will shake up the new season which will result in the addition of Maggie Grace as fellow doctor (yes, the token hot chick from Lost will be playing an MD) who assists Dr. Masters when a very important person is in need of Masters's expertise.

Over two season, Masters of Sex has established itself as one of television's best, combining drama and sexual education with a wry sense of humor (thankfully Betty and Lester still working at the clinic) and it only continues to get better in its third season. And it may end up being the first great television show that can make kids of the characters entertaining.

Masters of Sex airs Sundays at 10:00 on Showtime. You can download previous season of Masters of Sex on iTunes.

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 8/10/14

Ray Donovan: It looks like we may have finally learned Cochran's vice, and, umm... does that mean his "Scrabble" parties are actually swinger's parties?  I really could not tell if the chick he groped was fazed or not.  If not, that lends to my swinger theory.  I also figured that Ray would bed the reporter eventually, just not after one episode.  Interesting that he would intercept her from meeting with Mickey knowing her life would be in danger if she really learned what went down on the docks the night Sully died.

The Last Ship:  Did no one really not think to have the captain disguise his voice or let a female talk on the com just in case the Russians were listening?  I have when I am much smarter that characters that are supposed to be the smartest people in the room.  But then again, just how smart am I for watching a Michael Bay show?

Masters of Sex:  I am glad I did not look up the William Masters biography in between seasons because I was extremely shocked that he ended up punching out his boss and then ended up at a black hospital.  Makes me wonder if his nanny will somehow end up in his study now.  You know Bill wants to know if races react differently to sex.

The Strain:  A couple years ago, it seemed like every show had someone getting eletroshock theraphy, this year it is vampire autopsy.  And this one ended up being grosser than the one on Penny Dreadful.  You would think that after seeing just how long that biting thing was, they would not enter a house where another suspected infected person was without a way to block it.  Well at least the CDC seems to finally be teaming up with the old vampire slayer.  Though my favorite part may be the vampire in the shed (how very Shawn of the Dead) and the wife willing to feed the annoying neighbors to him.
 
Falling Skies:  So Lexi spends all that time in the cocoon and come out virtually unchanged (except appently for her eyes which I would not have noticed had it not been brought up), well at least physically.  She is apparently telekinetic now.

Switched at Birth:  Wow, out of control Daphne went dark this week.  C'mon, you cannot try to make out with Travis on the Ferris Wheel.  I am guessing a mother / daughter trip to AA will be coming sooner than later this season.

Pretty Little Liars:  Well at least drunk Hanna is still entertaining.  Granted she has not gotten into cocaine yet like Daphne.  But the big new is that my lesbian Swimf@n dream may actually be coming to fruition.  Though it is unclear if the new girl likes Emily or like likes her.  But unsurprisingly we did learn she has a sordid past and of course it involves Jenna.

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 8/3/14

Ray Donovan: To show just how more entertaining the second season is from the first, last year when Ray was trying to get Bridget into private and dour and featured Connor attacking someone for a reason that still was not completely explained other than he is turning into a hot head like his father. This time around the douchebag producer was even entertaining on his never-ending quest to have sex with his favorite pornstar. Sure it ended out exactly how I thought it would, with her getting a role in his movie, but it was still entertaining to watch. This is turning into one of the most improved seasons of television ever.

Masters of Sex: Why is it the smaller episodes (or what insiders call bottle episode) always reveal the most? The majority of the episode was just Bill and Virginia in a hotel room, but even role playing we learned so much about the two and how they view each other. This was an early contender for Best Episode of the Year.

The Strain: Finally, after three episodes, we finally got our first vampire kill. Well, maybe, as vampire lore, stake through the heart and decapitation is the only way to kill one; I am not entirely sure if bashes skull in qualifies as decapitation. Certainly at some point it does. But that was not even the big news this week, which was the full frontal male nudity on basic cable. That was not something I needed to see. Maybe I should not have asked what that thud was during his trip to the toilet.
You can download The Strain on iTunes.

Switched at Birth: I wonder if they added the weird Daphne / hooligan kiss to make the Toby / British chick kiss less awkward. Seriously, does the kiss a chick to get her to shut up and end a fight ever work in real life? I have only known it to end in a slap and more yelling.
You can download Switched At Birth on iTunes.

Under the Dome: So Uncle Sam killed the Token Hot Chick because she was one of the hands “holding up the dome,” what? Why start with her, why not off one of the annoying teenagers first, or his psycho nephew? This show is just infuriately dumb.
You can stream Under The Dome on Amazon Instant Video, free for Prime users.

Murder in the First: So Eric confessed after the trail that he did kill the stewardess and I am guessing he did not just say that sarcastically just to taunt the detectives. So I guess the final two episodes will be the detectives trying to get him on the murder of his father, whether he actually did that or not. Hopefully it solved and they do not save that trial for next season.
You can download Murder in the First on iTunes.

Pretty Little Liars: Let me preface this kiddies by saying do not drink alcohol, it is bad for you and makes you make bad decisions, with that said, drunk Hannah is becoming the best thing on the show.
You can download Pretty Little Liars on iTunes.

Tyrant: When the sheik got sick in the meeting I thought for sure someone poisoned him, be it the defense minister, or even his son or himself just to make Jamal look guilty. But I came away from meeting thinking there is no way he makes it very far, the only question is when and who is responsible. We actually got the answer to both at the end of the episode with Jamal in the bathroom with the toilet bowl. And for the first time, I am interested where the show goes next.
You can download Tyrant on iTunes.

The Bridge: I actually wanted to see Ray and Charlotte’s trip to Alaska. Oh well.
You can download The Bridge on iTunes.

Previewing Masters of Sex: Season Two

Back in the earlier days of the internet when message boards were a big part of going online, I was a big spoiler reader. That was up until the sixth season of Buffy the Vampire Slayer when I was spoiled very early on that Willow would end up being the season’s Big Bad which ruined my enjoyment of that season as I waited for her heel turn (sorry to those not caught up, but the season aired twelve years ago and Evil Willow does appear on the DVD cover art). Since then I unbookmarked all the spoiler sites I subscribed to and pretty much stay out of comment sections of non-spoiler sites because there are always a few trolls. And I have been much happier watching television ever since. With one exception: historical dramas. It took a lot of willpower to not go to Wikipedia while watching Deadwood to see what exactly happened to the real Seth Bullock and Al Swearengen (it was somewhat satisfying when the show ended premature to see what really happened to the characters after the show ended).

So after William Masters got fired at the end of the first season of Masters of Sex for his graphic sex study, it again took a lot of willpower to not go to Wikipedia to see where he went next or if maybe he was able to get his job back. I did make it the six months without peaking (thankfully the show is premiering earlier this year, a trend I hope continues next year when it premieres during the spring). For the spoilerphobes like me, I will not tell you where he end up, but of course Dr. Masters does find a place to continue the sex study by the end of the season premiere.

This season Annaleigh Ashford, who was the best part of the early episodes as one of the prostitute Masters observed before moving his study into the hospital, has promoted to the main cast and surprisingly plays a role in Masters ability in continuing his study. Despite being stuck on crappy CBS sitcoms, Beau Bridges and Allison Janney managed to find time to film a couple scenes for the premiere so you will not have to wait long to see if Barton decided to go through electroshock therapy (the youngest Scully also returns for a couple episodes even though she also booked herself a zombie show on The CW which may be the worst fate of all the Scullys).

Aside from homosexuality, this season also tackles some other taboo subjects from the fifties, some that are still talked about only behind closed doors today including nymphomania, abortion and birth control, and ambiguous genitalia in a newborn. Television geeks will undoubtedly enjoy the third episode of the season which is a bottle episode. But really anyone who likes television should continue to enjoy the new season of Masters of Sex, the best new show of last season.

Masters of Sex airs Sundays at 10:00 on Showtime.

The Ten Best Television Shows of 2013-14

For my list of best shows of the year, I only consider shows that air a majority of their episodes during the past year so I did not consider the most recent season of Mad Men which stupidly was split into half season with the remaining episodes not airing until spring of 2015. Here are the ten best shows that aired their episodes in the same twelve month periods.

1. Hannibal, Season 2 (NBC)

2. Justified, Season 5 (FX)

3. Cosmos: A Spacetime Odyssey (FOX)

4. Masters of Sex, Season 1 (Showtime)

5. The Blacklist, Season 1 (NBC)

6. Orphan Black, Season 2 (BBC America)

7. The Americans, Season 2 (FX)

8. Penny Dreadful, Season 1 (Showtime)

9. Parenthood, Season 5 (NBC)

10. Sons of Anarchy, Season 6 (FX)


And for fun, here are the shows that had the most Quotes and Songs of the Week from the past year.

Quotes of the Week:
Justified – 8
The Bridge – 6
Mad Men – 5
Homeland – 4
Shameless – 3
The Big Bang Theory – 2
Masters of Sex – 2
Once Upon a Time – 2
Orphan Black – 2
Penny Dreadful – 2
Pretty Little Liars – 2
Survivor – 2
The Challenge – 1
Community - 1
How I Met Your Mother – 1
King of the Nerds – 1
Nashville – 1
NFL Draft – 1
The Neighbors – 1
Ray Donovan – 1
The Sing-Off – 1
Tyrant – 1
Under the Dome – 1

Songs of the Week:
How I Met Your Mother – 6
Pretty Little Liars – 5
The Goldbergs – 4
The Americans – 3
Nashville – 3
Ray Donovan – 3
The Blacklist – 2
Growing Up Fisher – 2
Orphan Black - 2
Revenge – 2
Suburgatory – 3
The Big Bang Theory – 1
The Bridge – 1
Californication – 1
The Colbert Report – 1
Community - 1
Crisis – 1
Dominion – 1
House of Lies – 1
Mad Men – 1
Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. – 1
The Millers – 1
Perception – 1
Sons of Anarchy – 1
Tyrant – 1

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 12/18/13

Tomorrow I start my Best of 2013 lists, but before then, I thought I would have a rare mid week 57 Channels post because of all the television on Sunday that deserves some analysis. As for the best of list, you can contribute by filling out the 9th Green's Readers Favorite Songs of 2013 Poll at the bottom of this page (or just click the link).

Quote of the Week: If you had just discovered after 30 years that I was a martian, the least I could do was explain to you life on mars. (Margaret Scully, Masters of Sex)

Song of the Week: Days Are Gone – Haim (Revenge)

Big News of the Week: Hall and Oats Finally in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame: The inductees for next year’s Rock and Roll Hall of Fame were announced yesterday and to little surprise, Nirvana were a first ballot inductee (though I would have held off the twenty-fifth anniversary of Nevermind). After Rush was inducted this year, another long overlooked rock act with a feverish fan base Nirvana are also in. Peter Gabriel also got in for the second time, he originally was inducted as part of Genesis and this time will be as a solo artist. And things will get mellow with the inclusion of Cat Stevens and Linda Ronstadt. But for my money, the show will be headlined by Hall & Oates the greatest duo in the history of music. I am guessing the reason it took a decade and a half to be nominated (they were inducted after their first nomination) was because of those extremely cheesy eighties music video.

Once Upon a Time: After a really bad first half of the season, this show really needed a reboot, and surprisingly they actually did it, Storybrooke no longer exists, everyone is back in fairytale land where they left off with no recollection of what happened. While Emma and Henry live as is she never gave him up. Okay, this storyline reeks of the flash forwards on the final season of Lost, but as least we know now it will not all turn out to be purgatory (at least hopefully not). But why does Bae go back to fairytale land? He was in the real world when the curse went into effect. And if everything goes back to the way it was pre-curse, does this mean everyone who died will be resurrected. I am guessing that would be the best way to bring Rumplestiltkin back. Of course if that is the case then Peter Pan, the Huntsman, et al will also be resurrected.

With Neverland behind us (hopefully), we did get a glimpse of what is ahead. And no I do not really care how Captain Hook got his memory back. Nope, the real news is we got a glimpse on the next Big Bad: The Wicked Witch of the West. Get ready for some embarrassingly bad CGI flying monkeys.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

Homeland: The only thing I hoped for with the finale was that Brody died a horrible death and the writer finally followed through. If only two seasons too late. I was also kind of hoping Carrie would have a miscarriage but unfortunately that did not happen. But hopefully for next season grandpa and auntie take care of the Brody spawn because raising a kid in Istanbul sounds like a horrible idea. And I am guessing that Saul will be part of Carrie’s team in Istanbul. Though how Carrie got a promotion is pretty befuddling after everything she has done over the past season and a half.

Revenge: The series started off with Daniel (presumably at the time) getting shot, so I guess it is almost apropos that he ended up being on the other end of the gun for the teaser to this season. Though it is hard to believe even a drunk Daniel would shoot Emily. Unfortunately the teaser for the second half of the teaser has Emily with amnesia, one of my three least favorite plots on television. Hopefully we learn by the first episode she is faking because I really hate amnesia plotlines.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Revenge on iTunes.

Masters of Sex: Greatest colligate presentation ever. But shockingly the rainmaker got fired for it. So will another college take a chance on him or will he have to go back to running studies at whorehouses? I will be spending the next nine month trying to not go to Wikipedia to avoid spoilers. I did make it through three seasons of Deadwood without checking out history reports on the subject.

How I Met Your Mother: The Mother is so inconsequential that I completely forgot that she ran into Lily until she brought it up. The writers really should have came up with a good storyline for the Mother before actually folding her into the show because of right now, I am not sure if she even make the top 5 of the Ted Mosbey Girlfriend Power Rankings.
You can stream recent episodes over at cbs.com. You can also download How I Met Your Mother on iTunes.

The Sing-Off: Last week’s promo had me a little worried for the safety of Vocal rush and they did inexplicably end up in the Ultimate Sing-Off (even though Voice Play definitely should have been in the bottom two). But thankfully they did make it out unscaved and got two performances from the group. Though I do hope it is the last time we see the group in the bottom because they are significantly better than everyone else this season except Home Free and maybe Ten (that really should be the final three). Since only half of the groups performed, my Power Ranking has unchanged from Sunday with the exception of Element getting the ax.

1. Vocal Rush
2. Home Free
3. Ten
4. acoUstiKats
5. The Filharmonic
6. VoicePlay


Free Download of the Week: Something About December – Christina Perri (iTunes)

Video of the Week: We are a year away from Interstellar from hitting theaters, but you can have your first look now. Well, it mostly looks like stock footage except for a quick glimpse of Matthew McConaughey driving on a country road (which says nothing since the movie supposedly is about space). But that is enough for me consider the movie comes from Christopher Nolan, the guy behind Memento, Inception, oh, yeah, and the Batman trilogy.


Next Week Pick of the Week: What else is there aside from ABC Family’s 25 Days of Christmas?

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 12/15/13

Once Upon a Time: And now Greek Mythology is on the table for the show (how long until Norse mythology is tied in and Thor shows up). It was recently announced that the chick from Lost will be joining the cast as the next Big Bad, I originally thought that she may be the human form of Ursula, who was last seen as extremely bad CGI), but maybe she will be a God. As for Peter Pan unleashing another curse I do not care (but I will put ten cents on Tinkerbell earning her wings by stopping it with pixiedust; speaking of fairies, when did having your shadow ripped from you kill you). Nor do I care that The Darlings saying they are going back home even though home is nineteenth century England.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

Homeland: I did not think for a second that Brody had converted back to Al Qaida. It has come pretty obvious that the writers will never have Brody or Carrie turn on each other and have shown that have done the dumbest things for each other. And now Brody is in a heavily guarded compound with no way to escape (and very reminiscent to the way he assassinated the Vice President last season; why don powerful men keep inviting him into a room alone), but I am sure Carrie will still find a way to get him out even though the show would be much better without him.

Masters of Sex: Bill seeing Virginia throughout the episode seemed a little sitcom-y for me even though that last scene with them was very powerful. But it did seem apropos that Bill was obsessed with measuring phalluses considering the former and current lovers of Virginia engaged in a phallus measuring contest all episode.

The Sing-Off: Thank goodness the show is back and not a moment too soon after a lackluster season of The Voice. It has been over a month since The Voice has had a performance as good as Bottom of The River (if the girl who sang lead does not show up on The Voice next year, Mark Burnett has failed as a producer), What Makes You Beautiful or even Cruise. Unfortunately one of the groups that sang one of those songs was already sent home. It is a little weird how they split the third and four episodes especially considering what I considered the two weakest of final eight are both in the same episode. Then the two teams I thought had the best chance to advance far in the competition on Thursday both ended up in the bottom two, sadly with Street Corner Renaissance, who I had already penciled into the finals, going home. So now I am a little worried for Vocal Rush, who gave by far the best performance this season (and followed that up with my middle school jam by C+C Music Factory) even though there are two fodder teams on their episode. It also does not help that the promo makes it looks they struggle with their eighties tune.

If the two best groups from the first round do not make it to the live show I assume we have Mark Burnett to blame because the guy seems to like to have fodder in his sing shows. The other thing we have Mark Burnett to thank for is the new Ultimate Sing-Off where the two bottom teams have their own “Battle Round” with only one advancing, no Steals are in play. These were entertaining, but I am disappointed that they seem to have replaced the Swan Song. I do not see why they could not have done both (aside of course for licensing fees reasons). But anyway. Here is my Power Ranking for those still left in the competition.

1. Vocal Rush
2. Home Free
3. Ten
4. acoUstiKats
5. The Filharmonic
6. Element
7. VoicePlay


You can stream recent episodes on Hulu.

Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: I think I predicted this earlier, but it became pretty obvious that Sky’s mother is really Mae. But much like The Blacklist, the question is how long they will drag this out. At least in the winter finale, Lizzie came to the realization that it may be the case. How long until Sky figures this out. Mae is old enough, she is a SHIELD agent, Sky looks half Asian, how is May not her first guess. Really the only question now is, could Coulson be the father?
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. on iTunes.

Sons of Anarchy: Well that was an unexpected finale. After Jax killed Clay I theorized the only thing the show had left to do was for Tara to kill Jemma. Oops. Got that one backward. Now, I guess all there is left is for Jax to kill his other parent.
You can download Sons of Anarchy on iTunes.

Survivor: Blood vs. Water: Holy Ciera! She actually won an immunity challenge. Maybe she actually is good at puzzles; it is just that her mother is just that much better. But it looks like we are going to be in for a boring finale as the final three will be Tyson beating Gervase and Monica unless Ciera miraculously manages to win another immunity challenge or two. Though it would be obvious Hayden will be voted right back out if he comes back from Redemption Island, I do wonder if Monica will be more prone to flipping if it is Laura or even Tina. Monica probably still loses, but would have much better chance with a all girl final.
You can stream recent episodes on cbs.com. You can also download Survivor: Blood vs. Water on iTunes.

Nashville: Last week I did not even mention the promo monkeys teasing someone dieing this week because it seemed so obvious that it would be Lamar, it did not seemed worth even predicting. Oops again. But I did mention last week that if Will did not come out of the closet they might as well write him off the show and promote Layla to cast regular. So it was either Will or Peggy who may have seen her last day. But like I have said before, I do not believe anyone is dead until I see a body (and even then I am sometimes hesitant) and unlike Peggy who’s lifeless body we saw, we did not see Will’s body. So as of now I am guessing Will stepped off the tracks at the last moment.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Nashville on iTunes.

The Big Bang Theory: C’mon, if you are going to do a It’s a Wonderful Life episode, do a It’s a Wonderful Life episode, not five different segments with five different narrators. I would have liked to see an entire episode of Penny trying to hook up with Sheldon.
You can stream recent episodes on cbs.com. You can also download The Big Bang Theory on iTunes.

The Michael J. Fox Show: I do not why, but I laughed hysterically through the commercial break at the King of Pain joke.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download The Michael J. Fox Show on iTunes.

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 11/24/13

Once Upon a Time: Just when I thought they could not ruin Peter Pan anymore, they make his origin story an adult. Sure it makes absolutely no sense that Peter Pan’s shadow predates Peter Pan, but that is the kind of writing you get on this show. And even though I doubt that either will stick, but I have no problem with Henry dying or Rumplestilkin getting trapped in Pandora’s Box. And though the promo monkeys suggested not guessing what happens next, they bring Henry back to life and the second half of the season is Henry becoming the new leader of the Lost Boys.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

Homeland: I was hoping he would just rot in the half finished building for the rest of eternity but it looks like Brody will be back on American soil by next episode. And he will probably get a full pardon even though he is a known associate of Abu Nazir, tried to blow up the Vice President and other high ranking officials, and they succeeded in killing the Vice President the following season. Maybe if we are lucky, they will ship him overseas to help their asset in Iran.

The Walking Dead: Where has the fake cop been this whole time? Of course like every interesting character this show introduces, I fully expect her to be dead by the end of next episode. I do wonder if these new people are cousins to the Greene family because it is distracting how much the one looks exactly like Maggie.
You can download The Walking Dead on iTunes.

Revenge: When the promo monkeys hyped someone from Emily’s past coming back, I rolled my eyes when her gay husband showed up. Oops, he was not it. Then when the reporter got all Deep Throat meeting in a parking garage, I just assumed the British chick was back in town. Nope, Lydia is back from the dead. Wait, what? I thought she was dead, except I do not remember how. I remember he falling off her balcony onto a car but I thought she survived that. (I had to look it up, she was supposed to be on the airplane that exploded at the end of season one. So Lydia was not on it, Victoria was not on it, who exactly was on the airplane?)
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Revenge on iTunes.

Masters of Sex: An episode of Masters of Sex without any sex. Unless you consider seeing the inside of a lady count. I do now wonder if Dr. Haas and Vivian will meet each other again in the sex study. Now that she has had an orgasm it seems like she would try to reenroll (unless she was too embarrassed by the first rejection). And I wonder if Barton himself will ever partake in some sort a way even if it is just a way to “cure” himself.

Castle: Number one rule of television: if you do not find a body, they are not dead. And even if you do find a body, there is still a fifteen percent chance they still not turn out to be dead. So I never for a moment thought the serial killer was actually dead. And now that he has a plastic surgeon girlfriend, he could end up being anyone. He may even show up as Ryan’s doppelganger at some point.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Castle on iTunes.

Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: I was worried when they said the episode would tie into the movie because I do not like going to movies and prefer to watch them from the comforts of the couch. Thankfully they did not spoil anything (sure they were cleaning up after London was destroyed but you could tell from the trailer a city was getting destroyed; that an a city inevitably gets destroyed in every superhero movie). But it was a bit disappointing that they had a movie tie in episode and none of the characters from the movie showed up. They really could not have run into Natalie Pirtman for a second or two?
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. on iTunes.

Sons of Anarchy: Wow, they actually killed off Clay. He had to die at some point, but after he survived two gunshot to the chest from Opie I assumed he was going to manage to survive until closer the series finale. But here he is shot by Jax during the antepenultimate episode of the penultimate season. So now what? The series has always been about a power struggle between Jax and Clay and now with Clay off the board for the reminder of the series there is a gaping hole. The rest of the series cannot possibly be about the power struggle between Tara and Gemma could it?
You can download Sons of Anarchy on iTunes.

Survivor: Blood vs. Water: If I had not seen just the day before a dude shoot his step-father in the throat in front of his mother and wife, what Ciera did to her mother would have been the most coldblooded thing on television this week. It is one thing to vote your mother out, it is other to writer her name down then put “mom” in parentheses so she, and everyone in the world, knows that you shot your mother in the throat. And it was awesome and almost makes this horrible Blood vs. Water idea worth it. The most bizarre thing is that Ciera could be in the driver’s seat. The promo monkeys make it seem like the newbies are going to ban together to oust the veterans. The she could easily get in the final three. Once there she could actually win because people may be weary of voting for Caleb (because Colton is evil) and Hayden (who already won a rival reality show). Of course whenever the promo monkeys suggests something, it almost always goes wrong, which means one of the newbies will either not flip on the veterans or let the veterans get wind and Tyson will use his Idol.
You can stream recent episodes on cbs.com. You can also download Survivor: Blood vs. Water on iTunes.

Nashville: If I were Rayna I would have totally let the police arrest me and then win the war in the court of public opinion. I really doubt a digital single is really going to completely placate the head of the record label.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Nashville on iTunes.

The Big Bang Theory: It doe not even matter if Amy pointed out how wrong it was, the writers should have never have heldon make the slavery comparison, it just was not funny. It did not help that this episode just aired after Sarah Palin also made a very inappropriate slavery comparison.
You can stream recent episodes on cbs.com. You can also download The Big Bang Theory on iTunes.

Parenthood: Max is typically my least favorite character on the show, but Max asking out Hank’s daughter and the uncomfortable position that put Hank in was hilarious. Can’t they just have Hank’s daughter move back to California permanently? It would completely make up for the downer that the Julia storyline has been this season.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Parenthood on iTunes.

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 11/17/13

Once Upon a Time: So the Darling boys grew old enough to be in their twenties before Peter Pan kept them in a un-aging state, but Wendy looks exactly the same she did the last time we saw her. Alrighty.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

Homeland: Most shows have a point of view character, someone who speaks for the viewers, usually a newbie to the team, who asks the questions that the people watching would want to know. I am beginning to think Senator Lockhart is such the character on Homeland. He is the new guy to the CIA and looks around and asks, what the frack is wrong with you people and they ends the episode locked in the dark. Yep, that pretty much sums up the viewing experience of this season on Homeland.

The Walking Dead: Just like Brody on Homeland, it was only a matter of time before The Governor showed up. Brody was given pretty much a whole episode, three into the season (and has not been seen since) whereas The Governor only got a cameo at the end of episode five. Last week I predicted he would run into Carol, but it looks like he did not travel that far away from the prison. So that puts him in play for feeding the zombies rats that we saw early in the season.
You can download The Walking Dead on iTunes.

Masters of Sex: Well that was the least sexy sex scene ever. At least between two relatively attractive people. I never thought anything involving Lizzy Caplan would be possible. I do wonder who Masters will impregnate first, his wife or his assistant. I am a little surmised the talk of contraception has yet to come up in the research. Did they even have readily available contraception back in the fifties?

The Voice: It is hard to quit the show cold turkey because I need something to watch between 2 Broke Girls and the Blacklist and The Goldbergs and Sons of Anarchy so I half watched those hour and a half while flipping around and making pithy comments on Twitter (#VoiceSave Holly Henry). I was a little interested to how the Instant Save turned out hoping it failed miserably. And it kind of did. After making my pithy comment I decided to scroll the hashtag results and saw about 80-90% of them for Jonny, Blake even pointed this out when Carson asked him who he thought America would save. Even the retweet of The Voice’s official tweets were the most for Jonny (followed by Josh with Kat in the hole). Yet the first person eliminated with the lowest amount of tweets was Jonny. Huh? My first thought was there must have been a lot of tweeters who misspelled his name (most people would naturally want to put an “h” in it like Johnny Cash) but supposedle the show allows five different misspellings (people like Jonny, Jaquie, and Tessann need such a thing but it is funny to see the five ways you are allowed to misspell Ray). This just does not pass the sniff test. Unfortunately the Instant Save will not be going anywhere, at least no time soon because the ratings were way up from last week’s results show which was a series low for the show and even matched last week’s Tuesday performance show. Hopefully the novelty wears off and ratings drop again like I thought would when you pull a stunt that alienates half the country and it is scrapped for next season. But really all I want next season is better talent than what makes up this top ten.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download songs performed this week with the widget at right.

The Blacklist: I thought the promo monkeys said there was going to be a big reveal this week? Did I miss it? All I saw was more speculation that Red is really Lizzie’s father but no real confirmation.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download The Blacklist on iTunes.

Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: Yep, Simmons is quickly becoming the most entertaining character by a long mile on the show. Her awkward encounter with Agent Sitwell was hilarious.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. on iTunes.

Sons of Anarchy: Oh Tara, I told you that you should have turned on the club while you were in jail instead of concocting this elaborate plan that fell like a house of cards once you recruited a junkie and friend of the club. But now that she is at her breaking point, anything is possible with her. Speaking of anything is possible; Jax really tangled a web trying to get out of guns. Is he really going to turn rat and sell out both the Irish and the Koreans?
You can download Sons of Anarchy on iTunes.

Survivor: Blood vs. Water: I like when they start doubling up Tribal Councils post merge, especially when the votes are as obvious as Vytas and Tina. I also liked Vystas just throwing bombs all over Tribal on his way out. He called out Monica, pointed out the chicks could easily take over the game. I am surprised more people do not do it when they know their number is up. And though I am glad they retired the gross eating challenge seasons ago, I am glad they brought it back for Gervase to have to partake in it again. And he almost won this time. I wonder if he spent the last decade eating strange delicacies for this very moment.
You can stream recent episodes on cbs.com. You can also download Survivor: Blood vs. Water on iTunes.

Parenthood: It is weird the election storyline is expanding well past the real world elections. But I wonder if there will be a point where Amber goes to the press without Kristina’s consent. I was kind of assuming that was going to happen this week.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Parenthood on iTunes.

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 10/13/13

Once Upon a Time: That is the second time in as many episodes where someone who lived in the real world told someone stuck in fairytale land about how they are depicted in pop culture. At least they pointed out how absurd it is to have cast an Abercrombie model as Captain Hook when everyone knows him as an old dude with a bad perm. Neverland expands next week with the inclusion of Tinkerbell (those are some heavy wings to fill after Julia Roberts and Keira Knightley) which begs the question when will the Indians show up?
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

Homeland: Now there is the Carrie that was severely missing last season: off her meds and being driven crazy by her job. The crazier Carrie gets, the more entertaining the show is. At the end of season one I pondered how they would possibly let Carrie back into the CIA, but after having her committed, I am not sure what would be less likely, that the CIA would take her back after her escapade in the loony bin or if Carrie would be willing to go back after completely throwing her under the bus complete with an involuntary stay in a mental health facility. Granted I am sure they will be brought back together some how to track down Brody who was thankfully completely absent this week.

Revenge: If Aiden really wanted revenge on Emily, why not tell Victoria that she is really David Clarke’s daughter? That seems like the quickest way to bringer down, blow her cover. But we did get the first takedown of the season and I really cannot remember the last time she pulled out the red Sharpie. It created an interesting conundrum of whether to take down someone who clearly has repented.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Revenge on iTunes.

Masters of Sex: So who told Beau Bridges that the study moved to, um, copulation? If Dr. Haas did not do it like he says (not that I believe him) that would only leave the two, um copulating. Neither of which I would assume would admit to such a thing especially to their boss. But it is becoming pretty clear that Betty the prostitute is quickly becoming the break out star of the show, she always has a funny comment whenever she opens her mouth. I am sure there is a hooker joke in there somewhere, but I will just leave it be.

The Voice: Forget Kaley Cuoco, holy Neil McDonough sighting! That should squash the conspiracy theories that producers told the coaches to turn for Briana just because she had a famous sister (not to mention the son of the guy who brought Tijano music to America failed to turn a chair). And the dude was also the son of The Commodores drummer. Who knew the Commodores had a white drummer?

I wonder if the “Best of the Blind Audition” were just that or a preview of whom we can expect in the Live Shows. I would actually live with the twelve singers featured if that were the case although I was a bit surprised that Josh Logan and Nic Hawk were featured. I guess Christina does not have much else to spotlight, but it is hard to think Nic can make it two rounds with all the ringers currently on Adam's team. It does seem like there will be five singers per team this season because the show finally took my advice to add at least one Steal to the Knockout Rounds (last season would have been much more palatable if Ryan Innes, Midas Whale, Mary Miranda, and Luke Edgemon). Though I have a feeling most of the coaches will just end up stealing someone they just dumped in the Battle Rounds. My post-Battle Rounds Power Rankings are coming tomorrow and looking at the talent as a whole, this season may not be pretty. There really is only one person worth rooting for.


You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download songs performed this week with the widget at right.

The Blacklist: It is nice to see that Lizzie decide to look into her fiancée’s gun, so what exactly has that gun been used for to get it redacted by Homeland Security? And who was the dude with the apple? I am a little apprehensive that the questions are piling up without any answers. Red’s reasoning to why he picked Lizzie was a little muddling and does not quell any theories that he is really her father and really just stoked those flames.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download The Blacklist on iTunes.

Castle: Congratulation for those that guessed Kate would be back with the NYPD by the fourth episode (assuming she is welcomed back, but there will be no show if she is not; sorry dude who replaced her who’s name I did not bother to learn), I had it happening in this episode. Oh well. And if you are going to do a Saved by the Bell rip off, why not just get Screech and A.C. Slater to reprise their roles? I cannot image they are busy.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Castle on iTunes.

Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: It is becoming pretty clear what this show is missing, aside from the obvious better actors (can someone please show the token hot chick how to tell a joke), it really needs a Big Bad to battle. I am not sure if Joss Whedon created the idea of a Big Bad, but he certainly perfected it. I wonder if the scientist that Coulsen scarified will become one. He did look like the Silver Surfer when he reached out of the Gravitonium ball. Although I am not sure if a television show has a big enough to do the Silver Surfer (or something like it) very often.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. on iTunes.

Sons of Anarchy: I have come to expect disturbing scenes on the show, and this one probably does not make the top ten most disturbing scenes in the show’s history, but the guard forcing Clay and Gemma to have sex in front of them was pretty disturbing. I put the over / under on number of episodes until somebody actually does kill those guards at three. I would have put it at one but they may have more pressing matters after their clubhouse went boom.
You can download Sons of Anarchy on iTunes.

Survivor: Blood vs. Water: Wow. Calab had to have one of the ballsiest moves in Tribal Council history, definitely the ballsiest that did not involve an Immunity Idol. Dude just called his shot like Babe Ruth, obviously the girls quickly jumped on board and eventually Vytas (and almost Hayden) joined him to get rid of Not-Dante Culpepper. And it was the right move. Not-Dante’s reasoning to get rid of John was because his loved one was not on a tribe and then outright said at Tribal that it would be wise to vote out someone who is unattached in the game. At that point you have to turn on Not-Dante before he turns on you. And he had to do it right there while Ciera gave him the numbers, it would have been harder to after she was gone, even harder had Brad turned on him at that Tribal which Caleb could not be completely sure was the case. And Ciera still being in the game is amazing. She is the very reason her tribe lost three of their four challenges, two of which they had a sizeable lead in.
You can stream recent episodes on cbs.com. You can also download Survivor: Blood vs. Water on iTunes.

Ironside: There is nothing more awesomely cheesy than when detectives on cop shows have an epiphany almost completely out of nowhere. Ironside may have actually had the most absurd epiphany ever when his jump off mentioned Britney Spears which made him think of some missing girl from a decade ago in a Mandy Moore Christina Aguilera that looked like a witness who fled a crime scene. Wow. That is a humongous leap for a dude in a wheelchair. The show may only air one or two more episodes, but I am going to enjoy all of them. Hopefully there is more Casey Cartwright shoved dudes faces into pasta.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Ironside on iTunes.

The Big Bang Theory: How dare Amy besmirch the good name of Indiana Jones? I never cared for her inclusion on the show and now I am actively hating her.
You can stream recent episodes on cbs.com. You can also download The Big Bang Theory on iTunes.

Once Upon a Time in Wonderland: Wow there were some glaring plot holes from the start that were even bigger than the rabbit’s portal. Since the Knave started out in Storybrooke, that means this Wonderland should adhere to the same rules. That means Wonderland should have been frozen in the time between Emma being born and until she showed up in Storybrooke which was about thirty years. Yet somehow young Alice traveled Wonderland sometime in the nineties and then again recently as a teenager. And wasn’t it already established that Regina’s mother was the Red Queen? And now with no explanation she is a hot young blond with an accent (I just brought up the whole Captain Hook / Abercrombie model thing). No wonder why ABC put the show on during its death slot.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Once Upon a Time in Wonderland on iTunes.

Best of the Week: 9/28/13

Quote of the Week: Here’s one I thought I’d take to the grave: a while back YouTube changed its user interface from a star based rating system to a thumbs up ratings system. I tell people I’m okay with it but I’m really not. (Sheldon Cooper PhD, The Big Bang Theory)

Song of the Week: Islands In the Stream – Kenny Rogers and Dolly Parton (as sung by Wayne Brady and Wayne Brady, How I Met Your Mother)

Scene of the Week:


Big News of the Week: Power Rankings of New Fall Television: Television came back in full force this week with a slew of new shows. Surprisingly only one came D.O.A. (do not get too attacked to Lucky 7). Granted a lot of the more poorly reviewed show (We Are Men, Super Fun Night, Sean Saves the World, The Millers, Ironside, Welcome to the Family) do not premiere until next week. I did watch just over half of the ten new shows and here is absurdly premature Power Rankings:

1. The Blacklist
2. Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.
3. The Michael J. Fox Show
4. Back in the Game
5. The Goldbergs
6. The Crazy Ones

But who cares what I think. Here is how the shows stack up in total viewers in millions. As you can tell, it is very helpful to air after the two of the most watched shows on television like the top two shows here and not very helpful to air after another new show like the bottom three:

1. The Crazy Ones (15.52)
2. The Blacklist (12.58)
3. Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D (12.12)
4. The Goldbergs (8.94)
5. Back in the Game (8.01)
6. Mom (7.99)
7. The Michael J. Fox Show (7.50)
8. Hostages (7.41)
9. Trophy Wife (6.69)
10. Lucky 7 (4.43)

Although if you go by the ever more important 18-49 demo ratings, the rankings go like this:

1. Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D (4.7)
2. The Crazy Ones (3.9)
3. The Blacklist (3.8)
4. The Goldbergs (3.1)
5. Mom (2.5)
6. Trophy Wife (2.3)
7. Back in the Game (2.2)
8. The Michael J. Fox Show (2.2)
9. Hostages (1.8)
10. Lucky 7 (1.3)

Preview Picture of the Week:

“Wolfsangel” Sons of Anarchy, Tuesday at 10:00 on FX

Free Download of the Week: The Mother We Share – Chvrches (iTunes)

Deal of the Week: $3.99 Albums: Amazon is hosting a secret sale of albums that should be in everyone’s library including ones by Nirvana, Beastie Boys, The Police, and Boyz II Men. Update your library now on the cheap if there are holes.


New Album Release of the Week: Pure Heroine - Lorde

New DVD Release of the Week: This Is The End

Video of the Week: The triumphant return of Kenny Powers is tomorrow when the fourth and final season of Eastbound and Down premieres of HBO at 10:00. Check out a preview clip below:


Next Week Pick of the Week: Masters of Sex, Sunday at 10:00 on Showtime: Masters of Sex did not make my Power Ranking from above because it does not air until tomorrow, but if it was, it would have been number one with a bullet. To read more, check out my preview of Masters of Sex here.

Previewing Masters of Sex

Oh Showtime, when you announced that you were greenlighting a show called Masters of Sex; you had me at Lizzy Caplan. They could have filled the rest of the cast with the worst actors and hired the most inept writers, and the show still would have been highly watchable just because Lizzy Caplan was starring in a show called Masters of Sex. But they did hire one competent actor Michael Sheen to star opposite as the real life William Masters who pioneered research on human sexuality to Caplan’s Virginia Johnson who was his club singer turned receptionist turned assistant.

As for the writing, the show was created by Michelle Ashford who knows her way around a historical drama penning the HBO miniseries for The Pacific and John Adams. Masters of Sex pushes the subject matter closer to modern day in the late fifties when Masters decides there are enough books on how babies are delivered and decides to research on just how babies are made. It probably helps that he himself is having a bit of trouble making a baby of his own with his wife as the show starts up.

Masters of Sex is surprisingly funny. Despite wanting to explore new scientific ground, Masters is clearly still uncomfortable talking about sex especially around other people. And the way he collects data before he conducting his study at his university is humorous and involves a quick witted prostitute. But the funniest scene in the first episode involved Beau Bridges as Sheen’s boss watching a woman, um, achieve complication through a glass, um, self pleasuring devise. Oh science. Masters of Sex is far and away the best new show you will watch this fall.

Masters of Sex airs Sundays at 10:00 on Showtime.

Best of the Week: 9/21/13

Quote of the Week: Contrary to popular belief, no money mo problems. (Larry Bird, The Neighbors)

Song of the Week: Push the Sky Away – Nick Cave and the Bad Seed (The Bridge)

Scene of the Week:


Big News of the Week: God Still Hates Cleveland: It has not been a good year for Browns fans, last season the former Browns won their second Super Bowl (which in one more than the number of Browns playoff appearances in that time) and went through yet another regime change. And then they started off with two straight losses where the AARP member sophomore quarterback Brandon Weeden hurt his thumb. Word came down Wednesday that Weeden would not be starting Sunday but instead of second string and former semi-successful starting quarterback Jason Campbell starting in his place, some dude named Brian Hoyer, who is on his fourth team in the past year, would start. You would think this would be the worst news coming out of Cleveland this week, but nope, as Bill Simmons would say, “God Hates Cleveland” and that was not even the worst news that day.

A couple hours later I was scrolling through my feed reader and saw “Trent Richardson traded to Indy for First Round Draft Pick”. At first I thought I accidentally subscribed to the least funny The Onion sports rip-off site, but no, this was no joke, the Browns traded away their top four pick from just last season (which also cost them a second rounder because they moved up to get him) and arguably their best offensive threat for a pick that, best case scenario (barring an Andrew Luck injury) will be in the teens, worst case scenario in the twenties. So welcome to Cleveland rebuilding 8.1. Yep, God Hates Cleveland.

Preview Picture of the Week:

"And the Soft Opening" 2 Broke Girls, Monday at 9:30 on CBS

Free Download of the Week: Pillow Talk – Wild Child (Noise Trade)

New Album Release of the Week: Mechanical Bull - Kings of Leon

New DVD Release of the Week: Hannibal: Season One

Video of the Week: The most anticipated show of the fall does not premiere until next Sunday, but those that cannot wait, you can watch the premiere of Master of Sex now on YouTube. Sure, Showtime edits out all the mature content from there previews so if you already subscribe, you probably want to wait the week to see the unedited episode. But if you do not subscribe, and want to check it out to see if it is worth subscribing to the premium channel (between this and the third season of Homeland, the answer is a resounding yes), you will just have to imagine the actual sex while watching. Please note embedding has been disabled so you have to head over YouTube to watch.

Next Week Pick of the Week: Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D., Tuesday at 8:00 on ABC: Almost everything premieres next week but there is one show that stand out above all the new, and even the returning shows: Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (after just writing the show out two times around, I am beginning to think I may soon just shorten it to SHIELD in the very near future). This is the first television show created by Joss Weadon since Dollhouse and firs since he directed the blockbuster The Avengers. But the thing is, the show will either end up being the biggest show on television by the end of the year or quite possibly the biggest bust ever. It is also a bit weird that there are no reviews yet because it seems like ABC did not send out many screeners for the show. Not screening something for critics is rarely a good sign which leads me to believe that the at least the Pilot is mediocre at best and ABC did not want tepid review to hurt the show and is content that name recognition will pull in more than enough viewers.