57 Channels and Only This Is On: 12/18/13

Tomorrow I start my Best of 2013 lists, but before then, I thought I would have a rare mid week 57 Channels post because of all the television on Sunday that deserves some analysis. As for the best of list, you can contribute by filling out the 9th Green's Readers Favorite Songs of 2013 Poll at the bottom of this page (or just click the link).

Quote of the Week: If you had just discovered after 30 years that I was a martian, the least I could do was explain to you life on mars. (Margaret Scully, Masters of Sex)

Song of the Week: Days Are Gone – Haim (Revenge)

Big News of the Week: Hall and Oats Finally in the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame: The inductees for next year’s Rock and Roll Hall of Fame were announced yesterday and to little surprise, Nirvana were a first ballot inductee (though I would have held off the twenty-fifth anniversary of Nevermind). After Rush was inducted this year, another long overlooked rock act with a feverish fan base Nirvana are also in. Peter Gabriel also got in for the second time, he originally was inducted as part of Genesis and this time will be as a solo artist. And things will get mellow with the inclusion of Cat Stevens and Linda Ronstadt. But for my money, the show will be headlined by Hall & Oates the greatest duo in the history of music. I am guessing the reason it took a decade and a half to be nominated (they were inducted after their first nomination) was because of those extremely cheesy eighties music video.

Once Upon a Time: After a really bad first half of the season, this show really needed a reboot, and surprisingly they actually did it, Storybrooke no longer exists, everyone is back in fairytale land where they left off with no recollection of what happened. While Emma and Henry live as is she never gave him up. Okay, this storyline reeks of the flash forwards on the final season of Lost, but as least we know now it will not all turn out to be purgatory (at least hopefully not). But why does Bae go back to fairytale land? He was in the real world when the curse went into effect. And if everything goes back to the way it was pre-curse, does this mean everyone who died will be resurrected. I am guessing that would be the best way to bring Rumplestiltkin back. Of course if that is the case then Peter Pan, the Huntsman, et al will also be resurrected.

With Neverland behind us (hopefully), we did get a glimpse of what is ahead. And no I do not really care how Captain Hook got his memory back. Nope, the real news is we got a glimpse on the next Big Bad: The Wicked Witch of the West. Get ready for some embarrassingly bad CGI flying monkeys.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

Homeland: The only thing I hoped for with the finale was that Brody died a horrible death and the writer finally followed through. If only two seasons too late. I was also kind of hoping Carrie would have a miscarriage but unfortunately that did not happen. But hopefully for next season grandpa and auntie take care of the Brody spawn because raising a kid in Istanbul sounds like a horrible idea. And I am guessing that Saul will be part of Carrie’s team in Istanbul. Though how Carrie got a promotion is pretty befuddling after everything she has done over the past season and a half.

Revenge: The series started off with Daniel (presumably at the time) getting shot, so I guess it is almost apropos that he ended up being on the other end of the gun for the teaser to this season. Though it is hard to believe even a drunk Daniel would shoot Emily. Unfortunately the teaser for the second half of the teaser has Emily with amnesia, one of my three least favorite plots on television. Hopefully we learn by the first episode she is faking because I really hate amnesia plotlines.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Revenge on iTunes.

Masters of Sex: Greatest colligate presentation ever. But shockingly the rainmaker got fired for it. So will another college take a chance on him or will he have to go back to running studies at whorehouses? I will be spending the next nine month trying to not go to Wikipedia to avoid spoilers. I did make it through three seasons of Deadwood without checking out history reports on the subject.

How I Met Your Mother: The Mother is so inconsequential that I completely forgot that she ran into Lily until she brought it up. The writers really should have came up with a good storyline for the Mother before actually folding her into the show because of right now, I am not sure if she even make the top 5 of the Ted Mosbey Girlfriend Power Rankings.
You can stream recent episodes over at cbs.com. You can also download How I Met Your Mother on iTunes.

The Sing-Off: Last week’s promo had me a little worried for the safety of Vocal rush and they did inexplicably end up in the Ultimate Sing-Off (even though Voice Play definitely should have been in the bottom two). But thankfully they did make it out unscaved and got two performances from the group. Though I do hope it is the last time we see the group in the bottom because they are significantly better than everyone else this season except Home Free and maybe Ten (that really should be the final three). Since only half of the groups performed, my Power Ranking has unchanged from Sunday with the exception of Element getting the ax.

1. Vocal Rush
2. Home Free
3. Ten
4. acoUstiKats
5. The Filharmonic
6. VoicePlay


Free Download of the Week: Something About December – Christina Perri (iTunes)

Video of the Week: We are a year away from Interstellar from hitting theaters, but you can have your first look now. Well, it mostly looks like stock footage except for a quick glimpse of Matthew McConaughey driving on a country road (which says nothing since the movie supposedly is about space). But that is enough for me consider the movie comes from Christopher Nolan, the guy behind Memento, Inception, oh, yeah, and the Batman trilogy.


Next Week Pick of the Week: What else is there aside from ABC Family’s 25 Days of Christmas?

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 11/24/13

Once Upon a Time: Just when I thought they could not ruin Peter Pan anymore, they make his origin story an adult. Sure it makes absolutely no sense that Peter Pan’s shadow predates Peter Pan, but that is the kind of writing you get on this show. And even though I doubt that either will stick, but I have no problem with Henry dying or Rumplestilkin getting trapped in Pandora’s Box. And though the promo monkeys suggested not guessing what happens next, they bring Henry back to life and the second half of the season is Henry becoming the new leader of the Lost Boys.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

Homeland: I was hoping he would just rot in the half finished building for the rest of eternity but it looks like Brody will be back on American soil by next episode. And he will probably get a full pardon even though he is a known associate of Abu Nazir, tried to blow up the Vice President and other high ranking officials, and they succeeded in killing the Vice President the following season. Maybe if we are lucky, they will ship him overseas to help their asset in Iran.

The Walking Dead: Where has the fake cop been this whole time? Of course like every interesting character this show introduces, I fully expect her to be dead by the end of next episode. I do wonder if these new people are cousins to the Greene family because it is distracting how much the one looks exactly like Maggie.
You can download The Walking Dead on iTunes.

Revenge: When the promo monkeys hyped someone from Emily’s past coming back, I rolled my eyes when her gay husband showed up. Oops, he was not it. Then when the reporter got all Deep Throat meeting in a parking garage, I just assumed the British chick was back in town. Nope, Lydia is back from the dead. Wait, what? I thought she was dead, except I do not remember how. I remember he falling off her balcony onto a car but I thought she survived that. (I had to look it up, she was supposed to be on the airplane that exploded at the end of season one. So Lydia was not on it, Victoria was not on it, who exactly was on the airplane?)
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Revenge on iTunes.

Masters of Sex: An episode of Masters of Sex without any sex. Unless you consider seeing the inside of a lady count. I do now wonder if Dr. Haas and Vivian will meet each other again in the sex study. Now that she has had an orgasm it seems like she would try to reenroll (unless she was too embarrassed by the first rejection). And I wonder if Barton himself will ever partake in some sort a way even if it is just a way to “cure” himself.

Castle: Number one rule of television: if you do not find a body, they are not dead. And even if you do find a body, there is still a fifteen percent chance they still not turn out to be dead. So I never for a moment thought the serial killer was actually dead. And now that he has a plastic surgeon girlfriend, he could end up being anyone. He may even show up as Ryan’s doppelganger at some point.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Castle on iTunes.

Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: I was worried when they said the episode would tie into the movie because I do not like going to movies and prefer to watch them from the comforts of the couch. Thankfully they did not spoil anything (sure they were cleaning up after London was destroyed but you could tell from the trailer a city was getting destroyed; that an a city inevitably gets destroyed in every superhero movie). But it was a bit disappointing that they had a movie tie in episode and none of the characters from the movie showed up. They really could not have run into Natalie Pirtman for a second or two?
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. on iTunes.

Sons of Anarchy: Wow, they actually killed off Clay. He had to die at some point, but after he survived two gunshot to the chest from Opie I assumed he was going to manage to survive until closer the series finale. But here he is shot by Jax during the antepenultimate episode of the penultimate season. So now what? The series has always been about a power struggle between Jax and Clay and now with Clay off the board for the reminder of the series there is a gaping hole. The rest of the series cannot possibly be about the power struggle between Tara and Gemma could it?
You can download Sons of Anarchy on iTunes.

Survivor: Blood vs. Water: If I had not seen just the day before a dude shoot his step-father in the throat in front of his mother and wife, what Ciera did to her mother would have been the most coldblooded thing on television this week. It is one thing to vote your mother out, it is other to writer her name down then put “mom” in parentheses so she, and everyone in the world, knows that you shot your mother in the throat. And it was awesome and almost makes this horrible Blood vs. Water idea worth it. The most bizarre thing is that Ciera could be in the driver’s seat. The promo monkeys make it seem like the newbies are going to ban together to oust the veterans. The she could easily get in the final three. Once there she could actually win because people may be weary of voting for Caleb (because Colton is evil) and Hayden (who already won a rival reality show). Of course whenever the promo monkeys suggests something, it almost always goes wrong, which means one of the newbies will either not flip on the veterans or let the veterans get wind and Tyson will use his Idol.
You can stream recent episodes on cbs.com. You can also download Survivor: Blood vs. Water on iTunes.

Nashville: If I were Rayna I would have totally let the police arrest me and then win the war in the court of public opinion. I really doubt a digital single is really going to completely placate the head of the record label.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Nashville on iTunes.

The Big Bang Theory: It doe not even matter if Amy pointed out how wrong it was, the writers should have never have heldon make the slavery comparison, it just was not funny. It did not help that this episode just aired after Sarah Palin also made a very inappropriate slavery comparison.
You can stream recent episodes on cbs.com. You can also download The Big Bang Theory on iTunes.

Parenthood: Max is typically my least favorite character on the show, but Max asking out Hank’s daughter and the uncomfortable position that put Hank in was hilarious. Can’t they just have Hank’s daughter move back to California permanently? It would completely make up for the downer that the Julia storyline has been this season.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Parenthood on iTunes.

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 10/27/13

Once Upon a Time: Wow, these characters are stupid. You do not need Bellfire to crack the star map code: everybody knows the way to leave Neverland is take the second star to the right and go straight on ‘till morning. Now the hard part will be getting your hands on some fairy dust.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

Homeland: They could have easily had written out the Brody family after last season, and I am sure most viewers hoped for it, but I thought the writers had a real opportunity to look at the effects of the family left behind after learning their father and husband turned out to be a national pariah. Instead they just had Dana start up a crazy love affair with someone who may be a fratricidal murderer. I also figured that Carrie would eventually find her way back to the CIA by being a double agent against whoever the shady lawyer represented, but I would have never guessed that it was the plan from the start by Saul and Carrie.

The Walking Dead: You would think that if people know that everyone is already infected and you are living with old people that can kick it in the middle of the night, you would take more precautions to keep that from happening. Sure it would make for a less interesting show, but if I am living in a prison during a zombie apocalypse I would not be content with a sheet as a door, I would at the very least shut the door while I am sleeping or if there is a shortage of keys at the very least put some sort of noisemaker on the sheet if someone tries to stalk in at night.

We do get two mysteries during the episode, who is feeding the zombies rats at the gates, is it someone nefarious or one of the stupid kids feeling sorry for them? Then who is the person who lit the infected people on fire? Could it be the same person? I am guessing not as it seems the rat person may be a double agent for The Governor why the firestarter is just a concern, overzealous, health freak.
You can download The Walking Dead on iTunes.

Revenge: So who tried to Conrad is going to be an actual mystery complete with a silly hashtag. Alrightly. I did not give much thought to it after it was revealed that the brakes were messed with. So I guess I should guess who did it: Victoria’s other son.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Revenge on iTunes.

Masters of Sex: It may get a little weird seeing Tinkerbell on Once Upon a Time and then an hour later seeing her sans her fairy costume an hour later. But anyway.

The Voice: I am a hug fan of montages, there are plenty of performances I sit through that I wished were montage. Except this season not only was number one on my Power Rankings, Holly Henry, was montage, so number two, Cole Vosbury. I really have a hard time believing that either of their battles was possibly worse than the Kat vs. R. Anthony Battle. What made things worse there were a couple of Battles that featured Steals that would have been montaged. Did anyone really need to sit through Grey vs. Nic even if there was a Steal involved? Blake's Steal of Nic was already the worst use of a Steal when it happened, and looked even worse when three montaged contestants, Holly, Cole, Brandon Chase, all charted higher than Nic.

I do sometime wonder if The Voice even knows who their audience is. Holly was one of only two contestants to make the top 25 on iTunes for their Blind Audition (only one other person made the top 100, and three more made the top 200). And yet everyone who bought her song had to wait a full month from her audition to see she got montaged on the final episode of the Blind Auditions. It says something that the montage segment has the second most views from Battles this week currently on YouTube (and the one video with more views was from Monday which was on the internet a full 24 hours longer) while Holly and Cilla’s After the Battle video of all the Battles, even the ones from the first week and doubling all but one other video. Holly's version of Torn even made the top 100 on the iTunes pop charts, higher than all but four other Battles this season. The Voice has been spending a lot of footage this season on Tessanne Chin, Kat Robichaud, and Matthew Schuler this season, but I am willing to bet Holly, Austin Jenckes, and Preston Pohl will get a lot more votes starting next week.

The unknowing of the audience of the show extends to the coaches when you had multiple awkward situations this week where the people that got stolen actually outsold the winning. In the last two seasons of Steals, that only happened once that I am aware of when Caroline Glaser charted higher than Danielle Bradbery by only a couple spot. Again Will Champlin just barely outsold James Wolpert. But then there is Juhi who charted over 200 spots higher than George Horga Jr.

Speaking of the Juhi vs. George battle, there have been plenty of stupid reasonings as to why a coach picked someone. Blake’s I am going to stick with what I know during his country or bust plan last season being one of the dumbest. But that was overtaken this season by Cee-Lo reason why he picked George, who was so unmemorable that I originally thought his Blind Audition was montage and then he went on to hit the worst note of the season, over “Baby Einstein” Juhi because he knew this was what he was doing while Juhi was also contemplating college. Seriously Cee-Lo, do not give that boy any false hope, pull that band aid off now because music is probably not going to be George’s best option especially if you are just going to dump him in the Knockout Round. That was the second worse decision Cee-Lo has ever made on the show just behind Erin Martin over the Shields Brothers.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download songs performed this week with the widget at right.


How I Met Your Mother: Does CBS own Indiana Jones stock or something? Two weeks ago The Big Bang Theory focused an entire episode around Raiders of the Lost Ark. Now How I Met Your Mother built their episode around a scene from The Last Crusade. I assume that 2 Broke Girls will spend an episode calling Han Short Round to check off The Temple of Doom. I wonder which CBS sitcom will be stuck doing homage to Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. Hopefully it was We Are Men and since it was canceled it will never see the light of day. No one needs to be reminded of Kingdom of the Crystal Skull.
You can stream recent episodes over at cbs.com. You can also download How I Met Your Mother on iTunes.

The Blacklist: Really, that is where they are going to end the episode? Right when Lizzie’s husband shows her his shoe box of goodies? I hate when show like this. The only thing worse is when they do not start the very next episode where they left off and do not explain what happened until the middle or end of the next episode. I am guessing that, as I theorize when Lizzie first discovered it, that the box was planted there by Red (or maybe even those watching them) just to mess with her. If husband really is a double agent, why not bolt town after he realizes he has been made? Or at the very least kill wifey and make it look like an accident, why confront her?
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download The Blacklist on iTunes.

Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: One thing really missing from the show (aside from good acting; at least they got the Token Hot Chick into her underwear this episode) is a long term antagonist. I was happy to see the evil doctor back thinking she may be it. Except she quickly died. Maybe the girl in the flower dress will become that. Unless of course she dies in the next episode she appears in.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. on iTunes.

Pretty Little Liars: I have predicted it from the beginning, and we finally got actual visual confirmation, no dream sequences, no speculation, that Allison is actually alive. Now why is Ezra trying to kill her? And how did he get Mona, CeCe, and the rest of The “A” Team to carry out his evil doings? And why don’t these teenage girls ever go to the police when people are trying to harm them? And why doesn’t Hanna wear a corset every episode?

Ravenswood: I actually liked the set up of the show during Pretty Little Liars, but by the time the show premiered, I got bored really quick. It may have been a better idea just to give Caleb a Ravenswood storyline in Pretty Little Liars as opposed to giving him his own show. Or maybe they could have transitioned a little better by having a Liar or two stick around a couple minutes, especially Hanna in that costume. I am one hundred percent pro corset after seeing Hanna in that dress. I am still a little confused with what the show is about. So every time a solder comes home from war in Ravenswood, five teenagers die, and all happen to look exactly like the teenagers who died previously? Huh? After that ending, if it was not for the “next week on” package, I thought Ravenswood might have been a one episode special and not an actual series.

Sons of Anarchy: So that is Tara’s master plan? Fake a pregnancy then try to get Gemma to make you miscarry, and when she does not, panic and do it yourself? Alrighty. Seems a little convoluted and evil genius from a Bond overthinking to me.
You can download Sons of Anarchy on iTunes.

Survivor: Blood vs. Water: Oh Kat, the first time you strategize in two seasons and it fails miserably. I really hope Redemption Island does not have any more puzzles so Kat has a chance of getting back in the game (granted does sorting numbers twenty at a time even quaify as a puzzle?). Either that or Hayden falls on the sword and takes her place.
You can stream recent episodes on cbs.com. You can also download Survivor: Blood vs. Water on iTunes.

Nashville: I was hoping that Layla was really going to turn out to be the oh shucks girl they introduced her as because I thought that would be the best foil for Juilette. But apparently she is undermining. I did not even realize what she did to Scarlett until Will called her out for it. If anything I thought Layla was taking pot shots at Danielle Bradbury, the most recent winner of The Voice.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Nashville on iTunes.

Once Upon a Time: Wonderland: Anastasia turning out to be the Red Queen was one of the easiest "plot twists" to spot ever. I saw thatcoming as soon as they showed just part of her back in bed. But I kind of want to see a show where Anastasia turns into the Red Queen, that would be a much more interesting show than the one they made.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Once Upon a Time in Wonderland on iTunes.

Parenthood: Let’s be honest, the beginning of this season has been mostly a bore. It did pick up a bit this week as Kristina’s conversation with Hank and drunk Joel were entertaining. But I do wonder if the dip in quality this season is linked to Camille’s new cat face which is really distracking. Seriously old people, just age gracefully, it is much better to look old than look like an alien.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Parenthood on iTunes.

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 10/20/13

Once Upon a Time: That was a weird scene with Mulan and Sleeping Beauty. Was Mulan coming back to tell Sleeping Beauty she loves her? That was just a weird scene to have between two minor characters on the show especially when one of them has a boyfriend.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

Homeland: Since he was in the season trailer, it was only a matter of time before Brody showed up. But did they really need to devote the whole first thirty minutes and about eighty percent of the whole episode to him? And I missed why the Guatemalans are helping him. They are not Muslim so it is not for religious fanaticism. They said it was for some sort of “favor” so it has to be one big favor if they are going to pass on the bounty on his head to protect him.

The Walking Dead: Poor Beaver Cassidy Casablancas, he just has a hard times around roofs. The show has come up with some creative zombie scenes, but raining zombies has to be near the top. Cassidy was not the only familiar face to pop up in the premiere, there was the chick from Rome, the dude from The Waterboy, and I am pretty sure that was the best friend from Everybody Hates Chris. Unfortunately only one made it out of the premiere alive. But I would not be too surprised if any of them quite literally come back to bite the group in the behind.
You can download The Walking Dead on iTunes.

Revenge: I was suspicious last week when Aiden showed up last week eager to help Victoria bring down Emily yet did not reveal the most damning secret about her, so it was not much of a surprise that it turned out that Aiden was planted there by Emily to stir things up.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Revenge on iTunes.

The Voice: When Nic Hawk got stolen, I thought to myself, wow that is the least deserving Steal ever. Fast forward an hour later and I am saying the same thing about Anthony Paul. And if it is like last two seasons where they front load the more noteworthy steals in the first week, it may not be the last time I say that. There is also an enthusiasm gap for the Steals this season. If you think back to the last two seasons, coaches were breaking their buttons trying to steal Amanda Brown, Sasha Allen, and Caroline Glaser, but this season the coaches are waiting for contestants to say their goodbyes to push their buttons.

There also seems to be an increase of co-ed battles this season. It seemed in the past there may only be one per team if the genders were unequal. If my eyes were right whole spotting them in the previews, all but two of Blake’s battles are co-ed and half of Cee-Lo’s are too. I bring this up because of the first six co-ed battles this week (including montages); the fairer sex won the first five with only Ray Boudreaux prevailing for the guys. The best of the bunch was Caroline Pennell vs. Anthony Paul, though it is not a good sign when the best performance of the week revolves around a Justin Bieber song.

You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download songs performed this week with the widget at right.


The Blacklist: Did the show really just completely rip-off Breaking Bad? And just how does one explain creepy chemical scars all over your body to one’s wife? Um… I am asking for a friend.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download The Blacklist on iTunes.

The Goldbergs: I cannot confirm nor deny I watched scrambled porn back in the day, but I will admit I would occasionally watch WWF pay per views.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download The Goldbergs on iTunes.

Sons of Anarchy: I do not know why, but I really enjoyed that last scene with Jax making the cops apologize to all the Sons. What I did not like was the return Boydette Crowder. Seeing her on screen just makes my head hurt. It was also weird that the district attorney telling the mirror she was going “hood” which only turned out to be her taking off her wig to show her braids. Alrighty.
You can download Sons of Anarchy on iTunes.

Survivor: Blood vs. Water: Wow, the Loved Ones actually won something. Way to slide down a giant ramp and throw a ring on one of four pegs. That challenge was extremely lame. Unfortunately we have not gotten much of Kat this season, but her closing her hoodie was the best part of the episode.
You can stream recent episodes on cbs.com. You can also download Survivor: Blood vs. Water on iTunes.

Nashville: When Rayna said she was dropping out of of Juliette’s tour my first thought was I hope her label makes Juliette take Layla out on the road with her. Thankfully that seemed to be the case. These two on the road together should be more entertaining than when Juliette and Rayna shared the bill.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Nashville on iTunes.

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 10/13/13

Once Upon a Time: That is the second time in as many episodes where someone who lived in the real world told someone stuck in fairytale land about how they are depicted in pop culture. At least they pointed out how absurd it is to have cast an Abercrombie model as Captain Hook when everyone knows him as an old dude with a bad perm. Neverland expands next week with the inclusion of Tinkerbell (those are some heavy wings to fill after Julia Roberts and Keira Knightley) which begs the question when will the Indians show up?
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

Homeland: Now there is the Carrie that was severely missing last season: off her meds and being driven crazy by her job. The crazier Carrie gets, the more entertaining the show is. At the end of season one I pondered how they would possibly let Carrie back into the CIA, but after having her committed, I am not sure what would be less likely, that the CIA would take her back after her escapade in the loony bin or if Carrie would be willing to go back after completely throwing her under the bus complete with an involuntary stay in a mental health facility. Granted I am sure they will be brought back together some how to track down Brody who was thankfully completely absent this week.

Revenge: If Aiden really wanted revenge on Emily, why not tell Victoria that she is really David Clarke’s daughter? That seems like the quickest way to bringer down, blow her cover. But we did get the first takedown of the season and I really cannot remember the last time she pulled out the red Sharpie. It created an interesting conundrum of whether to take down someone who clearly has repented.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Revenge on iTunes.

Masters of Sex: So who told Beau Bridges that the study moved to, um, copulation? If Dr. Haas did not do it like he says (not that I believe him) that would only leave the two, um copulating. Neither of which I would assume would admit to such a thing especially to their boss. But it is becoming pretty clear that Betty the prostitute is quickly becoming the break out star of the show, she always has a funny comment whenever she opens her mouth. I am sure there is a hooker joke in there somewhere, but I will just leave it be.

The Voice: Forget Kaley Cuoco, holy Neil McDonough sighting! That should squash the conspiracy theories that producers told the coaches to turn for Briana just because she had a famous sister (not to mention the son of the guy who brought Tijano music to America failed to turn a chair). And the dude was also the son of The Commodores drummer. Who knew the Commodores had a white drummer?

I wonder if the “Best of the Blind Audition” were just that or a preview of whom we can expect in the Live Shows. I would actually live with the twelve singers featured if that were the case although I was a bit surprised that Josh Logan and Nic Hawk were featured. I guess Christina does not have much else to spotlight, but it is hard to think Nic can make it two rounds with all the ringers currently on Adam's team. It does seem like there will be five singers per team this season because the show finally took my advice to add at least one Steal to the Knockout Rounds (last season would have been much more palatable if Ryan Innes, Midas Whale, Mary Miranda, and Luke Edgemon). Though I have a feeling most of the coaches will just end up stealing someone they just dumped in the Battle Rounds. My post-Battle Rounds Power Rankings are coming tomorrow and looking at the talent as a whole, this season may not be pretty. There really is only one person worth rooting for.


You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download songs performed this week with the widget at right.

The Blacklist: It is nice to see that Lizzie decide to look into her fiancée’s gun, so what exactly has that gun been used for to get it redacted by Homeland Security? And who was the dude with the apple? I am a little apprehensive that the questions are piling up without any answers. Red’s reasoning to why he picked Lizzie was a little muddling and does not quell any theories that he is really her father and really just stoked those flames.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download The Blacklist on iTunes.

Castle: Congratulation for those that guessed Kate would be back with the NYPD by the fourth episode (assuming she is welcomed back, but there will be no show if she is not; sorry dude who replaced her who’s name I did not bother to learn), I had it happening in this episode. Oh well. And if you are going to do a Saved by the Bell rip off, why not just get Screech and A.C. Slater to reprise their roles? I cannot image they are busy.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Castle on iTunes.

Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: It is becoming pretty clear what this show is missing, aside from the obvious better actors (can someone please show the token hot chick how to tell a joke), it really needs a Big Bad to battle. I am not sure if Joss Whedon created the idea of a Big Bad, but he certainly perfected it. I wonder if the scientist that Coulsen scarified will become one. He did look like the Silver Surfer when he reached out of the Gravitonium ball. Although I am not sure if a television show has a big enough to do the Silver Surfer (or something like it) very often.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. on iTunes.

Sons of Anarchy: I have come to expect disturbing scenes on the show, and this one probably does not make the top ten most disturbing scenes in the show’s history, but the guard forcing Clay and Gemma to have sex in front of them was pretty disturbing. I put the over / under on number of episodes until somebody actually does kill those guards at three. I would have put it at one but they may have more pressing matters after their clubhouse went boom.
You can download Sons of Anarchy on iTunes.

Survivor: Blood vs. Water: Wow. Calab had to have one of the ballsiest moves in Tribal Council history, definitely the ballsiest that did not involve an Immunity Idol. Dude just called his shot like Babe Ruth, obviously the girls quickly jumped on board and eventually Vytas (and almost Hayden) joined him to get rid of Not-Dante Culpepper. And it was the right move. Not-Dante’s reasoning to get rid of John was because his loved one was not on a tribe and then outright said at Tribal that it would be wise to vote out someone who is unattached in the game. At that point you have to turn on Not-Dante before he turns on you. And he had to do it right there while Ciera gave him the numbers, it would have been harder to after she was gone, even harder had Brad turned on him at that Tribal which Caleb could not be completely sure was the case. And Ciera still being in the game is amazing. She is the very reason her tribe lost three of their four challenges, two of which they had a sizeable lead in.
You can stream recent episodes on cbs.com. You can also download Survivor: Blood vs. Water on iTunes.

Ironside: There is nothing more awesomely cheesy than when detectives on cop shows have an epiphany almost completely out of nowhere. Ironside may have actually had the most absurd epiphany ever when his jump off mentioned Britney Spears which made him think of some missing girl from a decade ago in a Mandy Moore Christina Aguilera that looked like a witness who fled a crime scene. Wow. That is a humongous leap for a dude in a wheelchair. The show may only air one or two more episodes, but I am going to enjoy all of them. Hopefully there is more Casey Cartwright shoved dudes faces into pasta.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Ironside on iTunes.

The Big Bang Theory: How dare Amy besmirch the good name of Indiana Jones? I never cared for her inclusion on the show and now I am actively hating her.
You can stream recent episodes on cbs.com. You can also download The Big Bang Theory on iTunes.

Once Upon a Time in Wonderland: Wow there were some glaring plot holes from the start that were even bigger than the rabbit’s portal. Since the Knave started out in Storybrooke, that means this Wonderland should adhere to the same rules. That means Wonderland should have been frozen in the time between Emma being born and until she showed up in Storybrooke which was about thirty years. Yet somehow young Alice traveled Wonderland sometime in the nineties and then again recently as a teenager. And wasn’t it already established that Regina’s mother was the Red Queen? And now with no explanation she is a hot young blond with an accent (I just brought up the whole Captain Hook / Abercrombie model thing). No wonder why ABC put the show on during its death slot.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Once Upon a Time in Wonderland on iTunes.

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 10/6/13

Once Upon a Time: As Lost Boy #6 in my high school production of Peter Pan I am not very happy that they have turned Peter Pan evil. He is more Jack Merridew (the episode even featured a conch shell) than the Peter Pan we know and love. Speaking of that conch shell, was the mermaid that blew it supposed to be Aerial? They can make her evil, I do not really care.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

Homeland: A quick addendum to my preview of the new season which was too spoilery. Homeland likes to throw I a game changer every couple episodes and Saul throwing Carrie under the bus may be the most shocking yet. Not only did he disclose to the whole nation that she is a crazy person, he actually lied under oath. We actually saw Saul listen to Carrie and Brody having sex last season. The fun of Homeland is watching the show to move on after completely blowing things up (sometimes quite literally) and this is an interesting set up to season three. I hope it does not end with Carrie and Brody on the lamb together. But if Saul’s testimony was the most shocking, Quinn killing the kid was the least shocking. As soon as Quinn was given the okay, I knew he would accidentally kill him, I just thought it would have been the kid under the desk, we just had to wait another thirty seconds for the murder to happen.

Revenge: The second season was rough, hard enough to sit through I was kind of hoping it would get canceled. But it came back complete with a new showrunner. Gone is Declan, Nolan’s money, The Initiative and Carrion (names of which even the characters never want to hear again). Of course we start off two months in the future (some things never change) where we see Emily shot twice in the abdomen by some unseen assailant who she trusts enough to be alone on a yacht with (my way too early prediction is the new French chick). Also gone this season (but not completely off this mortal coil) is Ashley who was sent back to her native land by the blackmailing team of Victoria and Emily. Emily even worked in some revenge essentially ending Conrad’s short run as governor of New York and making him think he has some degenerative disease that will turn him crazy (just thinking he has it will probably turn him crazy).
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Revenge on iTunes.

Betrayal: Betrayal sounds like a title that was considered but ended up not used for Revenge. As Revenge sank like a rock last season, it is weird they would team it with a new soap heavy show. Except Betrayal is boring. It came off like the first of a twenty act movie instead of the first episode of a television show. There was probably the reason they heavily featured the last minute of the episode (essentially spoiling the whole thing) in the promos because nothing of note happened except a simpleton may have killed his uncle we barely saw for reasons that were not well explained.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Betrayal on iTunes.

The Voice: I applauded the song selection last week unfortunately some of the songs this week were less inspiring but some guy did pull out an MGMT song and another person dusted off an underappreciated song by Bill Withers. Unfortunately we did not get to see much of the first Creedence Clearwater Revival song on the show as it got montage (I do not count the times Proud Mary was performed because everyone always does the Proud Mary version). I wonder if song selection did Malford Milligan in, he did trot out the well worn Let's Stay Together. Even with the tired song, I still though he was the third best singer this week. Hopefully he gets an invite back next season. Granted they seem to only invite back cute young boys. Which begs the question, where is Jane Smith from last season? She would be a perfect fit for Cee-Lo who was not around last season.

One guy that did get the return invitation was James Irwin (who did not even make my Contestants Who Should Be Brought Back last season) who made history by being the first returnee who got all four chairs to turn around. But I wonder if the coaches were having some button remorse because his performance started out well, they all pushed their button, then sat there stone-faced went he went into the awkward rock portion of the song. After that it seemed like the least competitive fight for a four chair turner ever with Adam even giving him a harsh critique. For some reason James picked Adam and may be the first four chair turner who exists this season.

The big new this week (which is not saying much because there were a lot of weak performances) was the audition of Briana Cuoco. Okay this is mostly because of her famous sister Kaley from The Big Bang Theory. Brianna’s rendition of You and I was pedestrian at best but Kaley lost her mind (like some family members do, but Kaley over did it a bit) when Christina turned around for her sister. Hopefully Briana gets better because I would not mind having Kaley Cuoco on my television, two to three times a week for the rest of the year.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download songs performed this week with the widget at right.


The Blacklist: Usually with procedurals there is a big twist at the end to the point you expect it and can even guess what it is before it happened, but I never saw Isabella Rossellini turning out to be a human trafficker who rails against human trafficking to eliminate her competition (which is ingenious in an evil kind of way). But it is disappointing that it looks like Elizabeth is just going to ignore the money and passports she found under the floorboards.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download The Blacklist on iTunes.

Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.: A slight improvement over the premiere and that does not even take into account the cameo of Samuel L. Jackson. But yeah, Sam Jackson was awesome.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Marvel's Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. on iTunes.

The Goldbergs: How do you have a show set in the eighties and have a storyline about your mother buying your embarrassing clothes for the first day of school and not play, or at the very least reference Parents Just Don't Understand. Instead they end the episode with a Styx song? Epic fail.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download The Goldbergs on iTunes.

Sons of Anarchy: I did not think Tig would end up dead this week, but I was surprised with a test being why he survived but it does make sense (it did not make since that Pope’s men would still care about his vendetta against Tig if he was dead). But in true Sons of Anarchy fashion, you were left wondering the fate of Tig all week, he shows up alive, and then four characters die violently in the episode (and that does not even count the Nazi’s). Thankfully Otto finally met his finale fate, how he made it this long is befuddling. The big shock was the death of the Marshall, he was set up at the major antagonist and now he is completely off the board (unless there is yet another vengeful relative in their family). But the Sons have their hands full with the Irish right now.
You can download Sons of Anarchy on iTunes.

Survivor: Blood vs. Water: Finally a challenge the Loved Ones can win, they have most of the muscle on the guys side including a former NFL lineman who pushed around dudes for a living, while the women are going against mostly forty and fifty year olds. Making it easier, one of the stronger returnees Tyson goes out with a shoulder injury. Should be a cake walk right? Right off the bat Brad Culpepper barely beat the aging Gervase, then Katie and Ciera lose to their mothers who are twice their age. At least Ciera put up a fight against her mother, when she went against Kat, it looked like she jumped off the platform just to get away from her competitor. So in two straight seasons, the new tribe has won one team challenge total and four out of sixteen challenges in three seasons before they started to mix up the tribes. It is really time to stop it with the fans vs. favorites concept even if they include loved ones in the equation.

Or just bringing back contestants period aside a rare All-Stars season (at least five seasons apart). Case in point: Colton. The dude caused the ost eye rolling when he cast was announced. He was a character you did not even love to hate, u just hated him so much you wanted to turn the channel. But he came back and he changed, cry a bunch in the second episode but by the second episode he was spreading lies amongst his tribe and making rude comments about them in his confessional. As by the third episode, after realizing he would be first of his tribe voted out, he just up and quit even though his tribe was on a winning streak and may have never gone to Tribal Council. And if that streak continues, there may be a tribe swap sooner than later when he could have been reunited with his fiancé and rebooted his game. Instead he quits and Probst and his tribe just lit into him. Probst even went as far to say he faked his injury One World so he could leave the game. I was a little surprised Probst did not ask Caleb if he wanted to quit with Colton. I kind of wanted Caleb to say, nope, I am good here. Oh well. So good riddance Colton, not only are you a horrible person you are a quitter.

This week we finally saw some loved ones go head to head in an Immunity Challenge and next week we will see it in the Redemption Island Arena when Candice take on her husband John (with Marissa still in the mix). It is one thing to not take your loved one’s spot on Redemption Island, but are you really willing to send them home? It will be interesting if Marissa finishes first, will Candice or John just concede the game to their spouse? Though I hate the Blood vs. Water theme, I have to admit the concept sets up some interesting storylines.
You can stream recent episodes on cbs.com. You can also download Survivor: Blood vs. Water on iTunes.

Modern Family: Our first Dylan sighting of the season, complete with a new haircut. Rumour has it that there is going to be a Modern Family. When I saw the headline I was hoping for a Dylan / Hayley starting a new life themed show, but unfortunately they are looking at one starring Manny's real father. Bummer.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Modern Family on iTunes.

Super Fun Night This was just an abomination. I do not know what I am going to do between Modern Family and Nashville, but it will not be watching this ever again. I implore ABC just to bring Suburgatory back now or if they do not want to out right cancel Super Fun Night, please switch it with Back in the Game, The Neighbors, or even The Goldbergs even though I have problems with that show, it is still at the very least watchable. Super Fun Night is not. ABC, you know Super Fun Night is not getting a second season already, just cut ties now before you do irreconcilable damage to Nashville's ratings when people like me flee your network as soon as Super Fun Night starts and never comes back.
If you must, you can stream episodes on Hulu. You can also download Super Fun Night on iTunes

The Bridge: Do we finally get to hear what cassette Sonya was so desperate to recover after her sister’s car was totaled and it was… I have no clue what song that was. As for the actual episode, it did not feel like a season finale it all; it more felt like a middle of a season episode. I guess that happens when you capture your big bad two episodes ago. The only plot point was that Linder’s “bride” was rescued. Sure some things were set up for a second season, the FBI let Charlotte know they are on to her just after she set up her new business with the Fausto (how her boy toy made it through the season alive was shocking). Of course Daniel stumbled onto a dead ninety-nine year old woman with a ton of cash, including Euros, stacked in her bathroom. And it looks like next season will be Marco trying to break into prison to kill David Tate. Hopefully that is more entertaining than the last couple episodes of this season.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download The Bridge on iTunes.

Nashville: I really liked the addition of the new singer from the reality show (and the show really needs a kick after last week’s bore of a premiere). Or more specially, I really like her as a bright eyed foil to Juliette’s jaded pop star, it looks like it will be more interesting than the Juliette / Rayna rivalry. I really liked the look on Juliette’s face when Layla said she was singing on of Juliette’s classic which was only matched by her look when the new bean counter said Layla’s song was number one on iTunes. I hope they keep Layla naïve and do not give her some deep dark secret like they give everyone on a soap opera.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Nashville on iTunes.

The Big Bang Theory: I always love it when they find a way to get Penny and Sheldon together, but I could have done without so much time with the other teams. Howard and Amy even joked how they have never spent any time together, and after this episode it may be wise never to give them screen time again even if Neil Diamond is involved.
You can stream recent episodes on cbs.com. You can also download The Big Bang Theory on iTunes.

Parenthood: This season token Friday Night Lights cameo is Jess Meriwether as Kristina’s campaign manager. You have to think Julie Taylor sits around wondering, “Why am I stuck on some crappy alien love story show on The CW with Hastings Ruckle; where is my Parenthood role?” It is odd that Lyla Garrity is the only original cast member that has been invited show but Jess is the third of the newbies to make an appearance. Jess was not the only new face this week as the dude from The Office also popped up. But I have to wonder if the show is really going to go the route where Julia ends up in the arms of the dude from The Office while Joel spends some quality time with Penny from Lost.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Parenthood on iTunes.

The Five Most (and Least) Anticipated Questions of Fall 2013 Television

Tomorrow sees the unofficial start of the fall television season with the return of Sons of Anarchy (Survivor and The Neighbors start next week and then almost everything else debuts the following week). So once again this year I am poising the five biggest (and five least interesting) questions going into the new season.

1. How Will Dan Harmon Address His One Year Sabbatical on Community? In a bizarre twist, Community creator and showrunner Dan Harmon was fired and then brought back a year later. Harmon has been vocal in his displeasure of the fourth season that went on without him so one would easily assume that the hugely pop-culture referencing show will take a page out of the Dallas playbook and make the entire last season a dream. I really do not see Harmon at all picking up where his predecessors left off. Another thing Harmon has to explain is the absence of Pierce and considering his hatred of Chevy Chase, it may be dealt a kin to when Isaac Hayes unceremoniously left South Park.

2. Will Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. Live Up to the Hype? There is no more anticipated new show this fall than S.H.E.I.L.D. and it has to do mostly because of the Marvel association. Sure it will be helmed by Joss Whedon who gave us Buffy the Vampire Slayer but he may be more focused on The Avengers 2 then the television show. Then there is the cast of unknowns, both actors and characters, none of which I am told are a part of the comic books aside from Agent Coulson who was last seen bleeding out. Colbie Smulders may make an appearance or two this season but How I Met Your Mother will stop any major arc. Sure that show is ending this season making Maria Hill available full time next season, but if the show does not come out of the gates like gangbusters there may not be a second season. S.H.I.E.L.D. does go against last season most watched scripted show N.C.I.S. and is launching ABC completely new Tuesday line up (it did luck out that NBC pushed The Voice to 9:00 and only has to go against the aging Biggest Loser and what looks to be a very vulnerable FOX comedy hour that also features two new shows including the much maligned Dads). If the show does not get a second season, it may go down as the biggest flop on television ever.

3. Will Once Upon a Time or Revenge Break Out of Their Sophomore Slumps? These two were the best two new network shows of 2011. Revenge dropped off the bigger cliff with The Initiative storyline which managed to be complicated and boring at the same time. I do not recall Emily crossing one person off her list. Apparently someone at the network thought the same thing, gone for season three is the showrunner and Ashley will soon fallow. While on Once Upon a Time, it became clear that the introduction of magic into Storybrooke just did not work. But unlike Revenge, the network is doubling down on the fairytale and launching Once Upon a Time: Wonderland in its Thursday 8:00 deathslot in hopes for its first hit there since Ugly Betty way back in 2006. (Since then there have been one and done seasons of FlashForward, The Deep End, My Generation, Take the Money and Run, Charlie’s Angels, Missing, Duets, Last Resort, and Zero Hour).

4. Will Miniseries Make a Comeback? NBC sure hopes for. They have been going with the spaghetti philosophy for a while throwing everything against the wall, putting Jay Leno on five nights a week, a three hour comedy block, not filming pilots, comedy four nights a week, launching shows off the Olympics, they even tried ripping off Mad Men (R.I.P. The Playboy Club). Yet The Voice may be their only big success story since the start of the disastrous Ben Silverman era back in 2007. Now they are getting back into the mini-series business, a staple of the network television last century. This may be wise because many of their full “series” do not air more than four hours as it is or just get burned off on Saturdays. NBC made their first slash by acquiring the rights to the sequel to History’s blockbuster mini-series The Bible (who knew there was a Bible sequel?). They made an even bigger splash by announcing a Hilary Clinton mini-series starring Diane Lane (who is way too attractive to play Hilary; she better get Charlize Theron’s make-up artist from Monster) who naturally made FOX News talking head’s explode claiming it would be unfair advertising for her inevitable White House run two years later, and even angered MSNBC anchors who do not want to be inadvertently linked to a political movie. Of course NBC is probably courting the controversy because it will only drive up its ratings because liberals will watch hoping for a fluff piece while conservative will watch because they like complaining about stuff. NBC also announced they will be jumping on the Stephan King bandwagon (whose Under the Dome adaptation is the most watched new summer series in decade) by airing a new The Tommyknockers miniseries (which already happened in 1993) as well as a reboot of the move Rosemary’s Baby and Plymouth about the Pilgrim’s journey across the Atlantic and the difficulties of settling in a new country. No other network is currently getting into the mini-series game, but on cable FX has already announced a couple limited series including a new Fargo show from the Coen Brothers starring Billy Bob Thornton.

5. Will Masters of Sex Live up to My Expectations? It stars Lizzy Caplan, in a show called Masters of Sex, all signs point towards yes.


As the great philosopher Butt-Head once pondered, “If it weren’t for things that sucked, how would we know if something was awesome,” so here are the five least anticipated questions of the new television season.

1. When Will Ted Meet the Mother? I stopped caring who the mother was back in season two and even though we finally met the mother, I still do not care how Ted meets her. Making things worse, rumor has it that the whole season will take place over the course of Barney and Robin’s wedding day which means the meeting will not come until the end of the season. Ugg. At least this is the final season.

2. Can Mixology Really Cram an Entire Season into One Night? The only thing worse that a full season taking place over one day is a full season taking place over one night. That is the hook for new show Mixology which follows ten single twenty-something’s, most that do not know each other at the beginning of the night, as they try hooking up before last call. And you though Work It would be ABC’s worst decision this decade. And yes I will be hate-watching all five episodes that air before it is mercifully canceled.

3. Who Needed to See Colton on Survivor Ever Again? I rolled my eyes when he showed up on the spoiler list and now that it is official I have to wonder who needs more racist gay Republicans from Alabama on their television screens. Now there are players you love to hate, most notably the first season winner Richard Hatch, but Colton was a contestant you just hate and I cannot image anyone wanting to see them on their televisions again. But I have to give Colton some credit, to this day, whenever I am accused of being racist (or even anti-gay), my stock response is that I cannot be racist (or anti-gay) because I would push through a crowd of women to make out with Shamar Moore. That never gets old.

4. Will The Voice Continue to Be the Blake Shelton Show? It has been reported that returning coach Christina Aguilera joke during the filming of the season five Blind Auditions that she heard The Voice turned into The Blake Shelton Show in her absence. Honey, I hate to break it to you, it always was The Blake Shelton Show and you were the least interesting and least competent judge on the show the first three seasons. I was fine with The Blake Shelton Show the first seasons when he cultivated diverse teams and pushed them to be better artists. But last season Blake went country or bust (which was a shame because Caroline Glaser could have been his Dia Frampton or Cassadee Pope this past season), turning The Voice into a Nashville Star, and if the show goes hard on the single genre again (or any single genre), it will start getting Nashville Star type ratings, which only lasted one season on NBC before getting canceled.

5. Seriously, the CW still exists? Who knew? Wake me up when they turn the Veronica Mars Movie into a weekly television series.


Enough with the questions, here are the shows I will be watching this fall and their premiere dates (new shows I will be giving a trial run in italics):

Mondays
8:00 – How I Met Your Mother (September 23)
8:00 – The Voice (September 23)
9:00 – 2 Broke Girls (September 23)
10:00 - The Blacklist (September 23)
10:00 – Castle (September 23)

Tuesdays
8:00 – Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (September 24)
8:00 – The Voice (September 24)
10:00 – Sons of Anarchy (September 10)

Wednesdays
8:00 – Survivor: Blood vs. Water (September 18)
8:00 – The Middle (September 25)
8:30 – Back in the Game (September 25)
9:00 – Modern Family (September 25)
9:30 – Super Fun Night (October 2)
10:00 – Nashville (September 25)

Thursdays
8:00 – The Big Bang Theory (September 26)
8:00 – Once Upon a Time in Wonderland (October 10)
8:30 – The Millers (September 26)
9:30 – The Michael J. Fox Show (one hour premiere starting at 9:00 on September 26)
10:00 – Parenthood (September 26)

Fridays
8:00 – Last Man Standing (September 20)
8:30 – The Neighbors (September 20)
9:00 – Grimm (October 25)

Sundays
8:00 – Once Upon a Time (September 29)
9:00 - Homeland (September 29)
9:00 – Revenge (September 29)
10:00 – Masters of Sex (September 29)
10:00 – Betrayal (September 29)

57 Channels and Only This Is On: 5/19/13

Once Upon a Time: Well I hit the big goose egg when predicting what would happen last week. I thought that Bay would turn out to be Peter Pan and the portal he fell into would take him back to Neverland. I also thought we would not learn this until another season (or five). Instead it looks like his son Henry will turn out to be Peter Pan. And I would have never guessed that the shadowy figure behind the anti-magic collision would turn out to be an actual shadow. Mostly because that makes little sense. Wouldn’t Neverland be in the same suspended animation all the other magical realms were in during the curse? How did Owen then hook up with the Shadow?
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Once Upon a Time on iTunes.

Revenge: As confusing and boring as the sophomore season was, that was a really good season finale. First and foremost they actually killed off the annoying and useless Declan (I was hoping Charlotte would follow suit but she is pregnant, maybe she will die during childbirth). Then after an entire season of teasing, we finally learn what The Initiative is up to, sure it was silly but it sounds like we are done with them now that Conrad was elected. And now Emily can team up with Jack to take down the Grayson’s (hopefully next season starts after the phase where Jack is mad at her for lying to him). Unfortunately Aiden is still around, somehow being able to pin the bombing on Nolan instead. I did not think I would say this a week ago, but I am actually excited for season three.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Revenge on iTunes.

Mad Men: During Don's hotel escapade I kept expecting him to tell Sylvia to punch him. Which begs the question, at what point in the relationship does Don ask a woman to punch him? Or is that just reserved for call girls?
You can download Mad Men on iTunes.

The Voice: After the unceremonious booting of Caroline Glaser last week, I had no desire to watch the parade of country and RnB singers America saved last week. But I needed something to fill my time in between How I Met Your Mother, 2 Broke Girls, and Castle so I gave it another try (because what else could have I done: read?) and a small part of me hoped they would have a “shocking” twist and bring Caroline back. Alas it was not meant to be. Apparently The Voice Gods were not happy with her elimination either because there was some sort of air conditioning problem this week. As for what I saw, the show was still as boring as I expected. Actually worse. Seriously, two songs by Martina McBride and Michael Jackson? Where is the diversity this season? Remember when they had country and RnB singers mixed in with rocker chicks, folk dudes, an opera dude, and a weird indie chick? Now they cannot even diversify the song selection. The hour I spent in between scripted shows would have been better spent watching Caroline’s videos on her YouTube page. Here is m personal favorite from her channel.


How I Met Your Mother: Wow, we actually got to meet the mother. It was also a bit surprising that they cast some random chick instead of at the very least a Hey I Know That Chick actress like his previous girlfriends like Allison Williams, Sarah Chalke Rachel Bilson, Jennifer Morrison, and most recently Abby Elliot. Even half of his one off dates were recognizable names (Ted really liked pop singers: Mandy Moore, Katy Perry, Britney Spears). Now the question is when will Ted meet the mother. The show really likes messing with the timeline so I will not be surprised if the wedding does not actually happen in the season premiere. Maybe the entire last season will be the previous eight years of all the close run in’s Ted had with the mother culminating with the wedding in the series finale.
You can stream recent episodes over at CBS.com. You can also download How I Met Your Mother on iTunes.

Castle: Beckett will not actually turn down a great job just because Castle proposed, will she? And it is not like he cannot move to Washington.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Castle on iTunes.

Nashville: Stupid promo monkeys. Of course Dante was going to be the one that died. Had you not told us someone would die, the death would have actually been shocking. Okay, Juliette’s mom following him to Hades was a bit shocking. And it was only a matter of time before Maddie’s paternity would come out, the only question was when and how and we finally got that this week when she found a paternity test saying the person she thought was her father is not. That should put a kink in the new Rayna / Deacon when Maddie theorizes to Deacon that she may be his daughter next week.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Nashville on iTunes.

The Big Bang Theory: So the big season finale twist is that Raj can now talk to woman without the aide of alcohol? Alrighty.
You can stream recent episodes over at CBS.com. You can also download The Big Bang Theory on iTunes.

Hannibal: The show has had some creepy kills early in its run, but I am not sure they will ever be able to find a more disturbing killing than trying to play some dude’s vocal cords as a cello. Kudos Bryan Fuller.
You can stream recent episodes on Hulu. You can also download Hannibal on iTunes.