Saturday, May 30, 2009

57 Channels and Only This Is On vol. LXXXII


Quote of the Week: I guess I’m never gonna go to Cleveland. (Mike, Rescue Me)

Big News of the Week: Showtime Does Some Casting: Following last week’s announcement that Alanis Morissette would guest star on the upcoming fifth season of Weeds (which will also feature Jennifer Jason Leigh) as Nancy’s obstetrician, Dr. Audra Kitson, comes news that John Lithgow will be appearing in all twelve episodes Dexter. He will be playing Miami’s latest serial killer, the Trinity Killer who likes to kill in threes, naturally. The fourth season of Dexter premieres Sunday, September 27 while Weeds returns Monday June 8. If your are too cheap to subscribe like me, their latest DVD’s are coming soon, Weeds 4.x is out this Tuesday but you will have to wait until August for Dexter 3.x. Both will also be available on Blu-Ray.



Coalition Links of the Week:
Buzz counted down the top 10 reasons she's keeping her TV on this summer. (BuzzSugar)

This week, Sandie interviewed Amy Ryan who plays the adorable Holly on The Office. (Daemon's TV)

This week, Jace reviewed the full pilot episodes of such series as ABC's Eastwick, FOX's Human Target, and ABC's The Deep End. (Televisionary)

Dan came across this bizarre video of Heroes' Zachary Quinto getting doused with milk. He wants to know what could be done to make the erstwhile Mr. Sylar less sexy in this video. (TiFaux)

Matt isn't good at math, but Edie Falco + a drug-addicted, well-intentioned nurse = must-see viewing of Nurse Jackie. (TV Fanatic).


Greek: I never really understood the all nighter, I always valued a fresh mind from a good night’s sleep as apposed to cramming at the last minute. Granted, I have to admit I tried osmosis on more than one occasion. You can stream current episodes over at ABCFamily.com. You can also download Greek on iTunes.

Charm School with Ricki Lake: I really hate these eliminations where they don’t actually eliminate anyone that they pull on reality shows. And when people leave you can smell the non-eliminations miles away. That is why Survivor remains the best, when they have an unexpected exit, Probst just says no tribal council and that is that. Going through all the pomp and circumstance and not eliminate anyone is just cheap. You can also download I Love Money on iTunes.

Rescue Me: As bad as it sounds, much like Lou I prefer the drinking Tommy Gavin above the sober one. And that bar scene is pretty much the reason why as it is nice to see our dearly departed again. Although Conner got real old real quick. You can stream current episodes over at Hulu.

Rescue Me on iTunes


Free Download of the Week: Absolutely Still - Better Than Ezra (Amazon MP3) - Paper Empire may be the weakest Better Than Erza album to date as most songs are just mediocre pop, but at least the lead single is free.

Deal of the Week: Buy More Lost on Blu-ray, Save More

Video of the Week: NBC launches three new shows this week, certainly everyone is aware of Conan O’Brien taking over The Tonight Show (click the link for an advanced look at his new set) and I will spare you the Spencer Pratt rap for the reboot of I’m a Celebrity… Get Me Out of Here! The other show is The Listener debuting this Thursday at 10:00. Below is a promo:



Next Week Pick of the Week: Royal Pains, Thursday at 10:00 on USA: A decent enough first episode airs this Thursday with a seventy-five minute limited commercial run. Look out for a full review sometime before then.

I will also like to point out Monday June 1st, Dave Matthews Band will be streaming a concert on Hulu. Look for a review of Big Whiskey and the GrooGrux King later that week.

Dave Matthews Band on iTunes


Friday, May 29, 2009

Those Calendar Girls Ain’t got Nothing on Me


Amanda Leigh - Mandy Moore

On her 2003 album Coverage, Mandy Moore covered plenty of songs from the seventies-singer songwriter era like Todd Rundgren, Cat Stevens, and Carly Simon which could explain why her latest album Amanda Leigh sounds like it was recorded during that era. And not to discredit her adult pop of her last album, the decent Wild Hope, but the music on Amanda Leigh is better for it.

Songs like Merrimack River and Song About Home float along and could be a great soundtrack if you are interested in a mellow summer lounging on a park bench. I Could Break Your Heart Any Day of the Week is a clap along that is much more fun than anything on Wild Hope (although I wonder what her newly husband thinks about the song being released right after they got married). Nothing Everything follows that trend but is more adventurous with Moore unleashing for one of the few times on the album while everyone in the studio just seems to have fun the longer the song goes on.

Of all of the songs, the one that could have fit best in the seventies is Pocket Philosopher which bounces along with its piano intro, some well placed flutes, and cutesy delivery to the point it borders on a song from a musical. There are a few hiccups along the way; Fern Dell just doesn’t come together as well as other songs on the album. While Everblue borders on smaltzy. Also at thirty-seven minutes, the album seems a little short. But for that half hour, everything can just fade away while watch the summer go by slowly.

Song to Download – Pocket Philosopher

Amanda Leigh gets a Terror Alert Level: High [ORANGE] on my Terror Alert Scale.



Thursday, May 28, 2009

First Impressions: The Goode Family


The Cast of The Goode FamilyMike Judge has a pretty impressive batting average when it comes to comedy: Beavis and Butt-Head, King of the Hill, Office Space and Idiocracy (and looking at the trailer, the upcoming Extract starring Jason Bateman will extend that streak). So there were high expectations for his latest animated show The Goode Family that follows a family that try to live the most politically correct way they can, living by the motto WWAGD (What Would Al Gore Do).

Maybe it is that pedigree that makes The Good Family a disappointment, where the rest of Judge’s work can be measured in gut wrenching laughter, The Goode Family can only be quantified by the number of chuckles. This could be because this is the first work Judge has done out of his comfort zone; Beavis was based on people he knew and Hill was in his wheelhouse being from Texas and his work in an office culminated in Office Space, but his attempt in liberal, blue state humor just doesn’t translate as well.

Plus some of the characters seem one note. The family raises their dog as a vegan but ends up eating neighbor’s pets which causes some of the biggest chuckles, but how can they keep that funny in future episodes? Same as their adopted white African-American son (he was white born in South Africa so technically African American). Funny, but where do they go in future episodes? And why, if he has been in America over a decade, does he speak broken English.

The one bright is the first episode is the Hummer driving, meat eating father-in-law (and seemingly right out of King of the Hill) who makes a too brief appearance. Hopefully there is more of him later in the season and Judge finds his comical footing sooner rather than later. If not, at least Extract will be arriving in September.

The Goode Family airs Wednesdays at 9:00 on ABC.

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

Best Television Shows of 2008-2009


Last year’s television season felt weird because the writer’s strike took a big chunk out of that season and the ripples were still felt this year as there were no new great shows and the shows that had been gone since December 2007 returned to a resounding thud in terms of ratings. And this year is when Saturday is becoming the new Friday with networks running off episodes there after canceling them. But anyways. Here are the best television shows of the past twelve months.

1. Friday Night Lights 3.x (NBC)

2. Chuck 2.x (NBC)

3. The Big Bang Theory 2.x (CBS)

4. Pushing Daisies 2.x (ABC)

5. Tool Academy (VH1)

6. Lost 5.x (ABC)

7. Greek 2.x (ABC Family)

8. The Middleman 1.x (ABC Family)

9. Leverage 1.x (TNT)

10. Survivor: Tocantins (CBS)




A nice even split among the networks this year with cable getting a larger share of the pie this year. Below is a breakdown as well as a running tally of the shows that led in numbers of Quotes and Songs of the Week from my weekly 57 Channels and Best of the Week rundowns:

Quotes of the Week

Chuck (6)
The Big Bang Theory (5)
Lost (5)
The Middleman (5)
Pushing Daisies (3)
How I Met Your Mother (3)
Eli Stone (3)
Pardon the Interruption (3)
Friday Night Lights (2)
Greek (2)
I Love Money (2)
Gary Unmarried (2)
My Name Is Earl (1)
Leverage (1)
Survivor (1)
Ten Items or Less (1)
Cupid (1)

Songs of the Week
Chuck (12)
My Name Is Earl (6)
How I Met Your Mother (3)
The Big Bang Theory (2)
Eli Stone (2)
Tool Academy (2)
Lost (1)
Pushing Daisies (1)
Cupid (1)
Saturday Night Live (1)
Trust Me (1)
30 Rock (1)

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Fifth Annual Scooter Television Awards


Welcome to the 5th Annual Scooter Television Awards honoring show that aired new episodes between June 2008 and May 2009. Without further ado, here are the winners of the 2007 STA's:

Best Scripted Show: Friday Night Lights

Best Sitcom: The Big Bang Theory

Best Cable Show: Greek

Best Reality Show: Tool Academy

Best Talk Show: Pardon the Interruption

Best New Show: The Middleman

Best Awards Show: 2009 Grammy Awards

Best Hour of TV: Chuck vs. the Colonel (Chuck)

Best Half Hour of TV: The Barbarian Sublimation (The Big Bang Theory)

Worst Idea: Continuing to watch Heroes

Best Shocker: Richard Hatch as John Locke (Lost)

Best Moment: Miles and Hurley debating time travel (Lost)

Best Song Placement: You Got It (The Right Stuff) – Tool Academy

Best Karaoke: Mr. Roboto - Jeffster

Hottest Token Hot Chick:

Yvonne Strahovski after a shower

Vvonne Strahovski in 3-D

Yvonne Strahovsk as a Buy More nerd


Best Character: Sheldon Cooper PhD. (The Big Bang Theory)

Best New Character: Louise Brooks (Gary Unmarried)

Best Guest Appearance: Carl Winslow (Chuck)

Most Entertaining Male Reality “Star”: Matuflex (Tool Academy)

Most Entertaining Female Reality “Star”: Sierra Reed (Survivor: Tocantins)

Most Annoying Reality “Star”: Coach (Survivor: Tocantins)

Best Quote: Well, then allow me to put this to you delicately. You see, men are dogs. They come, you know, sniffing around, barking up your tree. But if they don’t see a kitty cat up in that tree, pretty soon they stop barking. Dwight’s not missing. He's barking up somebody else’s tree. (Emerson Cod, Pushing Daisies)

Show That Should Be Brought Back: Pushing Daisies

Biggest Question for 2009-2010: Will Lost have a satisfying ending?

Write-In for Hottest Token Hot Dude:

Tim Riggins without a shirt

Tim Riggins best man

Tim Riggins and Lyla Garrity


Sunday, May 24, 2009

Feed Your iPod vol. XXX: Summertime


Tomorrow is the unofficial start of summer where I hopefully am able to defend my McGavin family croquet title. Of course the official start of summer comes when I first hear Summertime by DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince. So adjust the bass and let the alpine blast.

Summertime – D.J. Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince D.J. Jazzy Jeff & The Fresh Prince - Homebase - Summertime



Saturday, May 23, 2009

57 Channels and Only This Is On vol. LXXXI


Quote of the Week: For the last time, I am not Linda Knievel. I will never be Linda Knievel. (Lily – How I Met Your Mother)

Song of the Week: Captain Jack – Billy Joel (as sung by Will Ferrell; Saturday Night Live)

Big News of the Week: Upfronts: For thoughts on Upfronts and what I will be watching come fall, check out Scooter’s Fall Television Schedule.

Coalition Links of the Week:
Season finales? What season finales? Buzz turned her attention to the months ahead and asked which summer TV show has you most excited. (BuzzSugar)

Vance had quite the reaction when Kris Allen won American Idol. (Tapeworthy)

This week, Jace reported on all of the goings-on at the 2009 network upfronts and offered up extremely advance reviews on the full pilots of such new series as ABC's V, Happy Town, and Modern Family, and NBC's Community. (Televisionary)

Scrubs may be back next season, but Jennifer said her goodbyes now. (Tube Talk)

After reading a few Melrose Place spoilers, Matt cannot wait for the reincarnation of this classic series. (TV Fanatic)


Greek: All the searching for the secret society stuff was pretty funny, especially when they heard Rusty and Dale talking, but I’m and not sure about the sceret bonding between Cappie and Evan. And doesn’t the Dean hate them and tried to get the Greek system thrown off campus? If so why invite to Greek presidents to join you society? You can stream current episodes over at ABCFamily.com. You can also download Greek on iTunes.

How I Met Your Mother: So the mother will turn out to be one of Ted’s students? Eww. I really hope the writers come up with something creative that makes that not true because once we meet her, I will be creeped out for the rest of the series, even more than the thought of Future Ted telling his kids about all his sexscapades. You can stream current episodes over at Innertube. You can also download How I Met Your Mother on iTunes.

Charm School with Ricki Lake: Wow, it is disturbing how the Real/Chance girls are so oblivious to how they are the epitome of the Mean Girls. Hopefully they get that when they rewatch the episode. You can also download I Love Money on iTunes.

Rescue Me: Proably the funniest episode of the season. All the stuff with Katie Katherine had me on the floor and the preceding road trip and dinner as well as Garrity’s, um, problems. Then there were the out of left field scenes with Tommy’s sister and uncle at the VA hospital. Although the ending was a little weird. Is Katie running away? You can stream current episodes over at Hulu.

Rescue Me on iTunes


Free Download of the Week: Delicious Vinyl Sampler (Amazon MP3): Delicious Vinyl was only second to Def Jam in terms of great hip-hop records from the eighties, and on this sampler you Young MC’s Bust a Move, a Tone Loc remix, songs from The Pharcyde and member Fatlip and more.

Deal of the Week: "Night at the Museum 2" Movie Tickets Offer (Big, The Simpsons Movie, Night at the Museum)

Video of the Week: Tuesday sees the season finale of My Boys featuring former Cubs player Mike Fontenot. Check out a clip below:



Next Week Pick of the Week: The Goode Family, Wednesday at 9:00 on ABC: Ironically just as Mike Judge’s redneck comedy King of the Hill ended its run just as George Bush left office, his show about tree hugging hippies debuts just as the age of Obama starts out.

Friday, May 22, 2009

Press Release: Tuner Entertainment Networks Upfronts


All the news this week went to the major networks, but Tuner Entertainment Networks (TNT, TBS, TruTV) also held their upfronts earlier this week. Thier big news was that TBS was interested in picking up My Name Is Earl, a show they already syndicate. With their summer schedule set for a while (I will be talking more about those shows closer to their premieres), most of the shows in their pipeline won’t hit the air until 2010 at the earliest aside from the already announced Men of a Certain Age staring Ray Romano and Scott Bacula set to debut in December 2009 and Neighbors From Hell, an animated series coming in 2010. Here are the other programming and development plans in the works for the networks:

TNT

Scripted dramas

 UNTITLED ALIEN INVASION PROJECT – Six months after a worldwide alien invasion, a group of everyday heroes must rise up to fight for their survival – all while maintaining their humanity in the process. This project has been ordered to pilot and comes to TNT from DreamWorks Television and filmmaker Steven Spielberg, who will serve as executive producer along with DreamWorks Television heads Justin Falvey and Darryl Frank and screenwriter Robert Rodat. Rodat, who earned an Oscar® nomination for his screenplay for Saving Private Ryan, is writing the script for the pilot from an idea he co-conceived with Spielberg.

 CLASS ACTION (working title) – Steven Bochco, the mastermind behind many dramas, including TNT’s Raising the Bar, joins with Stephen Godchaux (Spin City) for this project, which follows a down-on-his-luck attorney as he fights for the disenfranchised.

 ZAPATA, TEXAS (working title) – The husband-and-wife team of Kyra Sedgwick (TNT’s The Closer) and Kevin Bacon co-conceived and will executive-produce this project, which is the story of a small Texas border town and its newly elected sheriff, “favorite son” Zeke. ZAPATA, TEXAS will follow Zeke as he navigates the equally treacherous waters of small-town politics and the volatile world of the U.S./Mexico border. Bacon is attached to direct the pilot.

 UNTITLED MATT WILLIAMS FAMILY DRAMA – Matt Williams, creator of Roseanne and co-creator of Home Improvement, takes a personal, passionate and ultimately heroic look at a loving, middle-American family that is keeping it together at a time when everything is trying to pull them apart.

 UNTITLED DANIEL PYNE NOIR DRAMA – Daniel Pyne’s many credits as a writer include The Manchurian Candidate (2004), Any Given Sunday and Pacific Heights. This project from Warner Horizon Television is set in 1954 Los Angeles, where a private detective tries to do the right thing as the ever-changing world makes it more difficult.

 PASTOR JAZZ – This drama focuses on a minister, his music and his passion for people’s hearts and souls, from the neediest to the wealthiest. Charles S. Dutton (The Express, Roc) is Pastor Jazz in this project, which is from Warner Horizon Television, Dutton, Mitchell Burgess (The Sopranos, Northern Exposure) and Robin Green (The Sopranos, Northern Exposure).

 MACALISTER – Henry Shepard is a washed-up-novelist-turned-professor who tries to inspire the boys of The Macalister School. F.J. Pratt (Less Than Perfect) and Dan Cohen (Less Than Perfect) look into the minds and mischief of students at an all-boys school in upstate New York, showing how one man can have an impact on children of wealth and privilege.

 PROOF – Dr. Geoffrey Pierce is an eccentric neuroscientist who uses his unique outlook to help the federal government solve complex cases. With an intimate knowledge of human behavior and a masterful understanding of the mind, this quirky, crime-solving doctor pulls lessons from an odd and imaginative view of the world. This project comes from ABC Studios, Kenneth Biller (Legend of the Seeker, Star Trek: Voyager) and Mike Sussman (Star Trek: Voyager)

unscripted dramas:

 THE MAYO CLINIC – When someone is ill and has been told nothing more can be done, there is one place to go – the renowned Mayo Clinic, where hope springs eternal. This project will chronicle the lives of Mayo doctors and their patients. Bill Guttentag (Nanking) and David Kanter (Rendition) are executive producers.

 TRIP OF A LIFETIME – Everyone has a dream or a wish unfulfilled. TRIP OF A LIFETIME will bring together extended, disconnected and deserving families. It could revolve around a lost family member, an unknown child, a missing brother or simply a returned keepsake. The project will be executive-produced by acclaimed author and travel expert Peter Greenberg and Rich Heller (Dallas: War of the Ewings)


TBS

 THE GAME OF LIFE – This half-hour sitcom follows four Pittsburgh friends as they reunite in their early 30s, only to discover life didn’t turn out quite as planned. THE GAME OF LIFE comes to TBS from Sony Pictures Television, executive-produced by Kevin James (The King of Queens, Paul Blart: Mall Cop), Rock Reuben (The King of Queens) and Jeff Sussman (The King of Queens, Paul Blart: Mall Cop).

 BIG TOW – This animated project from Sony Pictures Television, Tantamount and executive producer Clay Graham (The Drew Carey Show) will follow the life of J.D. Biggs, a small-town Tennessee single dad and local hero who runs a towing company.

 WEE HOURS – From Second City TV and executive producer Lowell Mate, this slice-of-life sketch comedy employs the talents of the legendary Second City comedy troupe to tell stories of Chicagoans during the wee hours of midnight to 6 a.m.


TruTV

 NFL FULL CONTACT (working title) – truTV and NFL Films will provide unprecedented, exclusive access to what really goes on behind the scenes in professional football, from draft day to the Super Bowl.

 CONSPIRACY THEORY WITH JESSE VENTURA – He’s undertaken some of the most dangerous missions in the world as a Navy SEAL. He’s body-slammed giants in the wrestling ring as a WWE superstar. He’s even conquered politics as the governor of Minnesota. Now, Jesse Ventura is about to face his greatest challenge yet: uncovering the most compelling, modern-day conspiracy theories. CONSPIRACY THEORY is produced by A. Smith & Co. Productions (Hell’s Kitchen, I Survived a Japanese Game Show, Kitchen Nightmares).

 U.S. SPECIAL OPS: DECLASSIFIED (working title) – From producer Tom DeSanto (X-Men, Transformers) and 44 Blue Productions comes a thrilling new series that unlocks the case files of America’s elite terrorist hunters. Through a mix of cutting-edge computer animation, action-packed recreations and hair-raising interviews with actual agents, this series will recount the shocking, formerly top-secret details of the people who keep us safe while we sleep.

 FULL THROTTLE – This four-part series, produced by A. Smith & Co. Productions, will provide an inside look at the world’s largest biker bar. Mike Ballard, beautiful bartenders and a full cast of characters race against the clock to serve huge crowds at Ballard’s Full Throttle Saloon in Sturgis, S.D., during the town’s famed, nine-day motorcycle rally. More than 300,000 people visit the Full Throttle Saloon during the annual event, where Ballard and his team feel the pressure to make a year’s salary in a short time window, all while providing patrons an experience they will not forget. The series marks the first time cameras have been allowed to capture every minute.

Thursday, May 21, 2009

Scooter's Fall 2009 Television Schedule


There seemed to be less drama surrounding the Upfronts this year because it seemed like everything was leaked to be canceled or renewed sometime last week or before. But those last minute decisions have proved to be entertaining. CBS called NBC dumping Medium “inexplicable” which made NBC point out that Medium had smaller ratings than two shows (Without a Trace and The Unit) they canceled which CBS retorted that Medium had better ratings than five it renewed (Chuck, Law and Order, Southland, 30 Rock, and Parks and Recreations). Hilarious.

But line of the week goes to My Name Is Earl creator Greg Garcia who responded when asked about not making it on the NBC lineup; “It’s hard to be too upset about being thrown off the Titanic.” Classic. But it may be a soft landing for Earl as it may be picked up by Fox. Note to Fox: I have not watched anything on your channel since the series finale of Arrested Development; if you pick up My Name Is Earl, I will take you off the parental block on my television.

Garcia isn’t the only one to be burning bridges as Jimmy Kimmel brought his gas can to the Upfronts. The big difference is Kimmel is still standing on his bridge. To the ABC advertisers, Kimmel said, “You don’t need an upfront, you need therapy.” Did someone forget to tell Kimmel these are the people that pay his salary? He then went on to say of the new shows, “We’re going to cancel about 90% of them,” he said. “Everyone is full of (expletive deleted).” I am assuming Kimmel saw the V reboot preview clips that are laughably bad or Flash Forward which looks as good as V but without the unintentional comedy. And the current ABC line-up didn’t go unscaved when Kimmel offered, “Next year on Grey’s Anatomy, your product could kill Dr. Izzie. It just depends on how much you want to pay.”

In other network news, apparently The CW still exists (albeit down to nine hours of programming a week). Who knew? But anyways. Here is what I will be (tentatively) be watching this fall.

Mondays
8:00 – How I Met Your Mother (CBS)
8:30 – Accidentally on Purpose (CBS)
9:00 – Trauma (NBC)
9:30 – The Big Bang Theory (CBS)
10:00 Castle (ABC)

Oh, CBS, why do you smite me? The TBBT/HIMYM was a nice combination, I know you totally ruining that by putting a crappy new show and the unwatchable Two and a Half Men in-between. I sure TBBT will get an extra 3-4 million viewers at 9:30 than 8:00, but shouldn’t CBS care more that they are inconveniencing me? I guess I will give Accidentally on Purpose a chance to bridge HIMYM and Trauma but I have a feeling that I will end up just flipping to whatever crappy show on VH1 during that half hour instead. At least when Chuck returns after the Olympics, I can watch that at 8:00, HIMYM on tape delay at 9:00 then TBBT at 9:30. And much like last season, I will most likely be watching Castle via the internet. The first season was moderately enjoyable and the cliff hanger should make things interesting.

Tuesdays
The day continues to the least interesting day on the TV schedule. I blame karaokers, has been’s and never were’s. And seriously, Jay Leno chews up five hours a week and NBC still devotes two hour blocks to The Biggest Loser and Donald Trump? Wouldn’t they get better rating if they were one hour and just a longer season?

Wednesdays
8:00 – Parenthood (NBC)
8:30 – Gary Unmarried (CBS)
9:00 – Modern Family (ABC)

Modern Family sounds like just a replacement for According to Jim except gayer. But it does star Al Bundy (who I assume isn’t part of the gay couple), Carol Vessey, and the token hot chick from Let’s Rob Mick Jagger (who I wouldn’t mind if were part of the gay couple), so hopefully it will be at least watchable.

Thursday
8:00 – Survivor (CBS)

Remember Thursdays were the biggest logjam of the week? Not so much for me anymore. I may turn into Weekend Update during the Survivor commercials, but how entertaining can that be in a non-election year?

Friday, Saturday, Sunday
I got nothing. At least until NBC comes to its senses and gives an ax to Southland and puts Friday Night Lights in its place.


Midseason
Chuck (NBC; Mondays at 8:00)
Lost (ABC)
I may also give Day One (NBC, Mondays at 9:00) and Mercy (Wednesdays at 8:00) a chance but will be on a short leash or reserved for Hulu.

Summer 2010
Friday Night Lights (NBC)

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

I Want My Music Television vol. LII


There have been a couple of videos that have caught my eye lately so I thought I’d give them some love since the death of Musical Television left a void for a forum on the art form. If you are interested in buying the video through iTunes, click the title link (where available). If you are interested in buying the song, look for a link in the analysis.


Don’t Wanna Cry



Can’t say I was too fond of the last album from Pete Yorn after his solid first two albums. Here is hoping that Back and Forth (due June 23) gets Yorn back on track. If your are interested in downloading Don’t Wanna Cry for free, head over to Spinner.com.


Use Somebody – Kings of Leon



If I were to make a list of the best songs of the first half of the year, Kings of Leon would be in the discussion. And I would highly recommend hunting down the mash up of Use Somebody with Same Old Song by the Four Tops.


Hey You – 311



311 predated the horrible rap/metal fad of the late nineties and have seemed to outlast it and still is putting out decent music. Plus this video is great, seriously, sign-wielding ninjas! Learning that the sign twirling was CGI would be like learning that Manny Ramirez was trying to get pregnant.


New in Town – Little Boots



I have no idea who Little Boots is (are?), but the song is definitely catchy and the video is cool especially the homage to Beat It.

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

You Think that’s Bad You Should Hear the Rest of My Album


Relapse - Eminem

Thanks to the ineptitude of the music industry, Eminem may be the last superstar it ever creates. After the teaser of My Name Is, Slim Shady exploded into the stratosphere of stardom with The Marshall Mathers LP with a mix of catchy disposable rap for the TRL set and more credible flows for the hip hop head. And during a time when ever rap album had over fifty percent of the songs having the word “featuring” attached to it, Eminem managed to fill full album with nary a partner except for a rare verse from his buddies 50 Cent and some beats provided by mentor Dr. Dre.

But it has been five years since Eminem has released a new album and in the rap genre, the years away can be counted like dog years. The Shady persona made it usually first appearance with the first single We Made You where Em does his usual run down of celebrities but raging on Sarah Palin, Jessica Simpson and Lindsay Lohan all seemed a couple months too late and even featured one of the weakest Dre beat to date. He even goes even more outdates bringing up with failed relationship with Mariah Carey on Bagpipes from Bagdad. But that does feature the best line when Em chants chucking corn much like the famous refrain about Chaka Khan.

The rest of the songs on Relapse can be put into different themes: murder and drugs. And for over seventy-five minutes and fifteen songs he goes over those topics over and over again. The former goes into gruesome detail playing out a special on Court TV to the point it is reminiscent of the horrorcore genre that failed to gain any acceptance, critical or commercial, during the mid-nineties. And most of the songs are just shocking for the sake of shock value and have no depth like say Stan.

Even more nonsensical is Eminem’s flow as most of the songs features the same nasal cadence that is featured on the first two singles We Made You and 3 A.M. Also Relapse seems Em tread the same subjects again and again with Lindsay Lohan, Hanna Montana, Kim Kardashian, Heath Ledger, and Christopher Reeves getting multiple references throughout the album. The last even Em knows he has gone to for even mentioning so later in the album blaming Reeves for having a last name that is too easy to rhyme. But on the bright side Relapse is Auto-Tune free.

The one thing that saves the album from being unlistenable is Dr. Dre’s beats which are as crisp as ever (sans the one for We Made You). Most of the songs have the trademark Dre bass attack while Bagpipes from Bagdad gets a Middle Eastern flavor. The best though is saved for last with the menacing strings of Underground. Hopefully this is a precursor for Detox whenever that actually comes out which is a running joke on the album with Eminem originally says 2010 but later postpones it to 2020.

Song to Download – Underground

Relapse gets a Terror Alert Level: Elevated [YELLOW] on my Terror Alert Scale.



Eminem on iTunes


Monday, May 18, 2009

Who Is This Jackass?


Benjamin Coach WadeFor better or worse, Survivor: Tocantins belonged to Benjamin “Coach” Wade. Not since Johnny Fairplay has a contestant this annoying had last this long, two tribal councils away from landing in the finals. So every episode this season we got a heavy dose of words of wisdoms and honor that proved to be hypocritical like how he wanted to compete against the strongest but was quick to vote out Brandon right after the merge or how he played the game truthfully but lied straight face about trying to realign with Sierra after his Warrior Alliance failed.

James J.T. ThomasCoach selling out Brandon (who in turned tried to blindside Coach at the same tribal council) set up the most improbably power triad in Survivor history in Stephen Fishbach, James “J.T.” Thomas, and Tamara “Taj” Johnson-George (SWV member and wife of Eddie) who went into the merge outnumbered by six to three (after Joe Dowdle had to drop up due to medical reasons) and preceded to orchestrate five straight Timbira eliminations to land themselves into the final four. Keep in mind I am not one of those instant historian that likes to throw hyperboles around, but that was the biggest upset in Survivor history. They became so confident they didn’t even bother to play their hidden immunity idol.

Tamara Taj Johnson-GeorgeThen came the biggest shock in a jury full of blindsides in that J.T. and Stephen turned on Taj to keep around Erinn Lobdell (who is one of the rare chick who looked better after a shower then a month without one for some reason) which was one of many questionable moves the duo made this season. But in the end, they were the last two standing, so what do I know? Well I did know that J.T. would win as I predicted as such during my First Impressions of Survivor: Tocantins. So there’s that.

Next up is Survivor: Samoa, which from a visual standpoint should be good because the South Pacific tend to be the most beautiful destinations. And if I could make one suggestion: it is time for Jeff Probst to stop asking if the immunity winner wants to give it away because, to the best of my knowledge, it has only happened once and that was in the bizarre All-Star season. Even the most secure immunity holders have passed it on so stop wasting time in asking and do away with it.

Survivor: Tocantins gets a Terror Alert Level: High [ORANGE] on my Terror Alert Scale.

Survivor on iTunes




Sunday, May 17, 2009

57 Channels and Only This Is On vol. LXXX


The Big Bang Theory: A solid end to thje season and hopefully the season premiere gives us some more time up in the arctic with the boys because there is certainly a lot a laughs being in tight quarters with Sheldon for a long period of time. But I am not sure I am on board for another Penny / Leonard coupling. You can stream clips over at Innertube. You can also download The Big Bang Theory on iTunes.

Greek: So Evan actually has a heart. They have been writing him as the biggest tool in the world for the last season or so it is nice to see him more complex like in the first season. And the Cappa Tau reverse scavenger hunt was pretty funny. You can stream current episodes over at ABCFamily.com. You can also download Greek on iTunes.

How I Met Your Mother: So two weeks ago Future Ted makes a big deal about changing him normal routine that led to meeting the mother, only to bump into Stella whom we know is not the mother. Then this week that chance encounter only leads to learning that Stella is going to California. Hurumph. For the season finale we better learn how bumping into Stella led to meeting the mother or I will be thoroughly disappointed. You can stream current episodes over at Innertube. You can also download How I Met Your Mother on iTunes.

Rescue Me:It is really hard not to laugh at all of Shawn’s cancer stuff yet I always seemed to let some out every time. Although does he really plan to skim some money here and there to get his treatment? Mike is dumb, but he isn’t that dumb. You can stream current episodes over at Hulu.

Rescue Me on iTunes



Survivor: Finally after about six weeks after his tipping point, Coach has been slayed. Of course he goes out with a poem and more hypocrisy with his death before honor. I wouldn’t be against devoting half of the reunion show for Probst calling out Coach on all the lies and stuff he has been caught on. You can stream current episodes over at Innertube.

Survivor on iTunes


My Name Is Earl: I said it the last time he was on, but I wouldn’t be against Norm McDonald joining the cast. Or at least show up more than once a season (if there is somehow another season). You can stream current episodes over at NBC.com. You can also download My Name Is Earl on iTunes.

You can also see my First Impression of Charm School with Ricki Lake (interestingly enough, the week the show debuted, Dean LaLa gets kicked out of a Nuggets game, she’s married to Carmelo Anthony) and my Last Impressions of Lost.



Saturday, May 16, 2009

Best of the Week vol. XXI


30 Rock on iTunesQuote of the Week: What’s done is done. (Sawyer – Lost) or
If it’s meant to be it’s meant to be. (Jack – Lost)

Song of the Week: He Needs a Kidney – Kidney Now (30 Rock; note: profits from the video on iTunes benefit the National Kidney Foundation)

Big News of the Week: Scooter McGavin Does not Use Twitter: I have been asked about a couple times, so to clear up any confusions, I do not have a Twitter account. And I would also like to add an additional spaz courtesy of losers making fake Scooter McGavin Twitter accounts: I DON'T HAVE A (expletive deleted) TWITTER... WHY WOULD I USE TWITTER??? I ONLY BLOG 5 PERCENT OF WHAT I'M UP TO IN THE FIRST PLACE. I'M ACTUALLY SLOW DELIVERING CONTENT BECAUSE I'M TOO BUSY ACTUALLY BUSY BEING CREATIVE MOST OF THE TIME AND IF I'M NOT AND I'M JUST LAYING ON A BEACH I WOULDN'T TELL THE WORLD. EVERYTHING THAT TWITTER OFFERS I NEED LESS OF. THE PEOPLE AT TWITTER KNOW I DON'T HAVE A (explicative deleted) TWITTER SO FOR THEM TO ALLOW SOMEONE TO POSE AS ME AND ACCUMULATE OVER A MILLION NAMES IS IRRESPONSIBLE AND DECEITFUL TO THERE FAITHFUL USERS. REPEAT... THE HEADS OF TWITTER KNEW I DIDN'T HAVE A TWITTER AND THEY HAVE TO KNOW WHICH ACCOUNTS HAVE HIGH ACTIVITY ON THEM. IT'S A (expletive deleted) FARCE AND IT MAKES ME QUESTION WHAT OTHER SO CALLED CELEBRITY TWITTERS ARE ACTUALLY REAL OR FAKE. HEY TWITTER, TAKE THE SO CALLED SCOOTER MCGAVIN TWITTER DOWN NOW .... WHY? ... BECAUSE MY CAPS LOCK KEY IS LOUD!!!!!!!!! I hope that clears things up.

Coalition Links of the Week:
Buzz got pumped about the upcoming sneak peek of Glee and shared some tidbits she learned from the cast. (BuzzSugar)

Vance celebrated his 2000th post on the blog by remembering some of his favorites over the years, including Everwood, Lost and Friday Night Lights. (Tapeworthy)

This week, Jace was once again consumed with all things Lost, offering his in-depth thoughts and theories about the two-hour season finale (The Incident, Parts One and Two). He feels much better now that he knows what lies in the shadow of the statue. (Televisionary)

Dan watched the premiere of The Fashion Show and found a temporary filler for the Project Runway-sized hole left in his heart. He still misses Tim Gunn, though. (TiFaux)

It's (VERY) early, but Matt is already excited about the second season of Fringe. (TV Fanatic)

Kate was bemused and befuddled when Food Network renewed lying, cheating Robert Levine's show. (TV Filter)


Free Download of the Week: LeftRightLeftRightLeft – Coldplay (Coldplay.com): Here is a nine song live album for those that don’t have the money to actually see Coldplay in person this summer for the low price of free. For those that are interested in a physical CD of the album, everyone that buys a ticket to the summer tour will get one at the door of the show.

Deal of the Week: Up to 50% Off in Our Spring TV Event (Veronica Mars, Arrested Development, Married with Children)

Video of the Week: The latest The Office webisode features Creed back to blackmailing ways. Check out the video below to see who his latest victim is.



Next Week Pick of the Week: How I Met Your Mother, Monday at 8:30 on CBS: Two weeks ago Ted told an elaborate story about how he changed his regular routine that led to meeting his mother only for him to run into Stella. Last week: no mention of the mother, just Stella moving to the left coast. Will we finally learn why meeting Stella that day led to being introduced to said mother in the season finale? Hopefully it is the goat they have been teasing for awhile.

Friday, May 15, 2009

Lyrics Quiz: As Seen on TV 2009


As we wind down the television season, I am going to run down the best music placement of the past twelve months and as an added twist, I am going to do it in Lyrics Quiz form so you have to guess to see the actual list. As usual, place your guesses in the comment (or e-mail me), both artist and song title, and if you are correct I will un-bold the lyric. You can also get a bonus point is you correctly guess which show the song was featured on and double bonus points if you correctly guess the character how sang the song on the show if it was not performed by the original artist (you can steal the bonus point if and only if someone correctly guesses the lyrics). Now since I don’t watch every show on television and there are plenty of unoriginal shows out there that copy other show’s musical taste, I will only accept quality television shows, and I am the one who decides whether a show is quality. Now onto the quiz:

1. I got a secret I’ve been hiding under my skin. My heart is human, my blood is boiling, my brain: IBM. (Mr. Roboto - Styx; guessed by Angie; Bonus Not Guessed)
2. There’s nothing that a hundred men or more could ever do. (Africa - Toto; guessed by Doug; Bonus: Jeffster of Chuck both guessed by Julie)
3. I know a girl who thinks of ghosts. She’ll make you breakfast, She’ll make you toast. (She Don't Use Jelly - The Flaming Lips; Bonus: Landry of Friday Night Lights; all guessed by Doug)
4. Say my name, sun shines through the rain. Oh life so lonely and then come and ease the pain. (Eternal Flame - The Bangles; guessed by Doug; Bonus: Olive of Pushing Daisies; both guessed by Rebekah)
5. I don’t ever wanna feel like I did that day. Take me to the place I love. Take Me all the way. (Under the Bridge - Red Hot Chili Peppers; guessed by Doug; Bonus Not Guessed)
6. Said it before and I'll say it again, while others pretend, I need you now and I'll need you then. (Love Will Keep Us Together - Captain & Tenille; guessed by Angie; Bonus Not Guessed)
7. Moon appears to shine and light the sky with the help of some fireflies. I wonder how they have the power to shine. (Baby I Love Your Way - Peter Frampton; guessed by Angie; Bonus Not Guessed)
8. First time was a great time. Second time was a blast. Third time I fell in love, now I hope it lasts. (You've Got It (The Right Stuff) - New Kids on the Block; guessed by Doug; Bonus Not Guessed)
9. What I want you got it might be hard to handle. Like the flame that burns the candle. The candle feeds the flame. (You Make My Dreams - Hall and Oates; guessed by Angie; Bonus Not Guessed)
10. And you may tell yourself this is not my beautiful wife. (Once in a Lifetime - Talking Heads; guessed by Angie; Bonus Not Guessed)
11. I’ve acted out my life on stages with ten thousand people watching. But we’re alone now.
12. I used to be a renegade. I used to fool around. But I couldn’t take the punishment and had to settle down. (Hip to Be Square - Huey Lewis and the News; guessed by Angie; Bonus Not Guessed)
13. Plant a seed, plant a flower, plant a rose. Plant any one of those. (MMMBop - Hanson; guessed by Doug; Bonus: Chuck guessed by Julie)
14. All we have to do is to take these lies and make them true somehow. (Freedom '90 - George Michael; guessed by Doug; Bonus Not Guessed)
15. We are young, heartache to heartache we stand. No promises, no demands. (Love Is a Battlefield - Pat Benatar; guessed by Doug; Bonus Not Guessed)
16. Just barely got out of school, came from the edge of town. Fought like a switchblade so no one could take him down. (18 and Life - Skid Row; guessed by Doug; Bonus Not Guessed)
17. I don’t need the king of the world as long as I am the hero of this little girl. (Heaven - Warrant; guessed by oug; Bonus Not Guessed)
18. She's into superstitions black cats and voodoo dolls. (Living la Vida Loca - Ricky Martin; guessed by Curtis; Bonus Not Guessed)
19. I see you my friend and touch your face again. Miracles will happen as we dream. (Crazy - Seal; guessed by Angie; Bonus Not Guessed)
20. I would gladly give up musical genius Just to have you as my very own, personal Venus. (Be My Yoko Ono - Barenaked Ladies; guessed by Curtis; Bonus Not Guessed)
21. You’re the one thing that I can’t get enough of. So I’ll tell you one thing: this could be love. ((I've Had) The Time of My Life - Bill Medley & Jennifer Warnes; guessed by Angie; Bonus Not Guessed)
22. “Can you teach me throw?” I said “not today, I got a lot to do.” (Cat's in the Cradle - Harry Chapin; guessed by Angie; Bonus Not Guessed)
23. You lying so low in the weeds. I bet you gonna ambush me. You’d have me down down down down on my knees. (Barracuda - Heart; guessed by Angie; Bonus Not Guessed)
24. My morals got me on my knees, I’m begging please, stop playing games. (Mercy - Duffy; guessed by Angie; Bonus Not Guessed)
25. I once got busy in a Burger King bathroom. (The Humpty Dance - Digital Underground; guessed by Doug; Bonus Not Guessed)


Bonus (need performer and song being parodied): Pulling down her pants, yanking off my own. Underneath the mistletoe I’ll make your sister moan. (Jingle Bells - Barney Stinson; guessed by Rebekah)